On November 9th when my Mom's Earthly life ended and her Heavenly life began, it seems that a flood of questions entered my mind that I'd never given any thought to before. I knew that soon after November 9th the holidays would begin to rush in. First up was Thanksgiving, which came and went...without my mother's presence. Soon after Thanksgiving I knew that one of the most difficult "firsts" was right around the corner. December 12th...my mother's birthday...without my mother.
As often as I've wondered what she's doing in Heaven, who she's met, who she's reunited with...did it all happen the day she got there or do the "meet & greets" take place over the span of eternity...I've been so very curious about THIS day...the day of her BIRTH.
I've wondered...are birthdays celebrated in Heaven? Or is the day that you ENTER Heaven (in my Mom's case, that would be November 9th) the day that is celebrated? Or is there NO celebration at all? I just don't know. Sure wish I did though.
Anyway...my mother's birthday has always been an interesting one. Challenging is probably a better adjective.
With some folks, friends and family have a fairly good idea of what to get that individual as a gift. With my mother...not so much. She didn't really have a "favorite" anything.
No favorite color.
No favorite food (or at least I thought, until I read her Auto-obituary).
No favorite musical artist.
No favorite actor.
No favorite author.
No favorite fragrance.
No favorite song.
No favorite TV show.
Nothing.
Yet, even without a "favorite" anything...she always loved whatever I would get her. Perhaps that was just her being my Mom. But anything I got her, she cherished.
Over the past 10 years or so, I came to learn that there were 3 things she particularly liked...one of those three, she LOVED.
She liked scented candles.
She liked toe socks.
And she LOVED chihuahuas...especially her own. Agape, Lazarus and Sarah were her babies. Of the three, Agape was MY favorite. I cried like a baby when he died. He was the sweetest dog I'd ever known.
Sarah died a couple years ago, and she was truly my "Momma's girl". Sarah and my Mom were BFFs. When Sarah died, my Mom was crushed. Even in casual conversation if Sarah was mentioned my Mom's whole demeanor would change and I could actually SEE the sadness come over her. Eventually, I learned not to mention Sarah.
And then there was (and still is) Lazarus. My Mom called him her "Baby dog". Sweet sweet Lazarus. He now waits for my Mom to walk through the door again...not understanding that she never will.
So...as I said, my Mom loved her dogs, scented candles, and toe socks.
Although I couldn't get her a new dog each year for her birthday, I could (and DID) get her toe socks and candles. She never wanted or asked for anything, yet she was always so happy when I'd walk in with my simple little gifts. Yet what she enjoyed MOST OF ALL was the fact that I was THERE. Most days I wasn't able to stop by until after work. When I'd get to the house she was ALWAYS sleeping. My mother slept more than anyone I've ever known. But as soon as I'd get there, within minutes she'd be rounding the corner, find her spot in the living room, and would sit with me & the kids for as long as she could before she'd get tired again. I will always remember the words she would say as we'd get up to leave, "Thank y'all for coming over. I love ya, and I had a wonderful birthday". Even as I write these words I can still see her in the chair she sat in, and I can hear the words as if she's in my ear right now. Right now.
So...I may not have any idea about what her day was like today, when I said my morning prayer I asked God to give my Mom a special hug. I never ask Him to hug her FROM me, because honestly, I don't think she knows or remembers who I am. She won't know or remember me until I get to Heaven. At least that's what I believe. In my mind, knowing and remembering are forms of looking BACK here to Earth, and since Heaven is PURE joy, there's no way that anyone THERE would EVER want to look back HERE at all of the sadness, and evil that goes on in "the world". I don't really care to argue the point or convince me otherwise. In that regard I'm pretty set. And for that reason, I just ask God to give her a special hug. HE knows who it's from and for me, that's all that matters.
So there you have it. My Momma's birthday in a nutshell. Oh, and in case you were wondering...her favorite food was "grits and eggs".
As you can imagine, this has been a difficult day for me, and I sure could've used a hug or two...or three or four...
I miss my mother more than I ever imagined I would. And on THIS day, and EVERYDAY, I just want to see her face, hear her voice, and give her another hug. I miss my Mom greatly, and I look forward to the day when we are reunited...in Heaven, where we will NEVER have to say goodbye again...EVER.
To my Mom:
Thank you so much for giving me life and loving me!
Happy 64th Birthday!!
I LOVE YOU!!!
Let the DIALOGUE begin: What ARE (or WERE) YOUR Mom's 3 favorite things?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
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