Parenting License REVOKED!

Ok...so here's the deal.

With all of the talk in the news lately about "Harambe the Gorilla" and the "neglectful parents" of the little boy, it's got me to thinkin'.

Yes...I feel awful about Harambe being shot and killed. Whenever I see his picture, the first word that comes to mind is REGAL. He was a BEAUTIFUL creature. Strong. Intelligent. Majestic. Interestingly, I've never once looked at him and thought, "Dangerous." Yet I know that because he was an animal, we had no way of getting into his mind to know what he was thinking, so to most onlookers, "Dangerous" was the only word that came to their minds. I get it.

Of course, in the grand scheme of things, human life is to be regarded more highly than the life of an animal, so I understand why it was deemed necessary to kill Harambe in order to save the child. As I write these words I can ASSURE you that had that been one of MY babies in the gorilla habitat WITH the gorilla, not knowing WHAT the gorilla was going to do...I would have wanted EVERY protective measure taken to save the life of MY child...even if it meant (unfortunately) killing the animal.

So here we are, days later and the "fingers of blame" are flying...toward the parents. One of whom wasn't even AT the zoo when the incident took place. Why he, and his criminal history are being called on the carpet, simply baffles me. But that's another post for a different day.

Back to "the blame game."

Now I've gotta admit...when I first heard the story, my initial reaction was, "How in the heck did the boy climb in? Wasn't anybody watching him?" I actually had that thought for a couple of days. Then I realized that sometimes...things just happen. Not intentionally, but when you are dealing with young children...and especially when there are more than one...sometimes...things just happen. And no one is to blame.

So my mind took a lil trip down memory lane. Back to a time when my son was maybe three years old, and my girls were older...five and eight years older. That would've put them at eight and eleven.

We're out shopping, just me and the kiddos, and as we get to the register to pay, I tell the girls, "Watch your brother." This didn't mean that I was leaving them to go somewhere else in the store...I just knew that I'd be dealing with the cashier and getting the purchase squared away, so I needed an extra set of eyes (in this case there were TWO sets), to watch the little one.

My transaction was done and I said, "Ok. Let's go." When I looked next to me (where ALL of my kiddos SHOULD HAVE been), there were only TWO...the girls. My three year old son was GONE...no where in sight.

Of course, I panicked. We started looking all over the store and calling his name. No response. We continued to look and...as it happens in the movies...I found his shoe. ONE SHOE. All by itself...just ONE SHOE.

Now if you've ever seen a movie where a child has been kidnapped, you know how this goes. ONE thing is always left behind. A blanket. A toy. A SHOE.

My heart raced even FASTER. WHERE WAS MY BABY?!?

Security came to help us look. It was an all out search!

Then...I hear this tiny little voice. A familiar little voice.

"Mommy."

I ran toward the voice, and there he was...my baby was in the middle of one of the circular clothing racks with a toy that he must've found somewhere in the store. He probably thought (or knew) that I would say, "Put that back," so he just took it upon himself to find a nice quiet place to go play.

Such a relief! To find my baby boy safe and sound was an absolute blessing and relief.

After that, I kept a much closer eye on him when we were out, but that incident simply reminds me of how quickly and easily a child can get out of one's sight.

Was I a neglectful parent because I lost my son in the store? Many of the "Harambe Gorilla Supporters" and even those who thought it was okay to shoot, but still find fault in the parents, would say that I was. I should have been the PERFECT parent...NEVER EVER EVER letting my child out of my sight.

Well folks, what can I say..."Stuff" happens. It happened to me. It happened to the mother of the little boy in the gorilla habitat. It happens.

Now...Let's move on and Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever gotten stuck in a place where you shouldn't have been?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

HAPPY Mother's Day? Indeed it was!

Today is Mother's Day and the day is about to come to a close. For me, it was bittersweet, yet I am going to let the sweet overcome the bitter.

Sweet - All 3 of my kiddos were with me today and we all went to church together. And oh what a time we had a church today. What a time, what a time! All I can say is, "you HAD to be there!"
Sweet - Me & the kiddos went to visit my mom, which I'm sure made her happy.
Sweet - Because I am simply blessed to be the momma of such great children. Not every mother is as blessed and I am well aware of that fact.

The only bitter part of the day was the fact that the father of my children hasn't wished me anything. No "Happy Mother's Day", not even a "You SUCK as a mom!" Nothing. In years past I would at least get a text message. This year, not even that. I guess he was busy.

Oh well, I'm not gonna let that small cloud of disappointment rain over what was otherwise an absolutely AMAZING Mother's Day...for so many reasons. Simply amazing.

So I'll leave you with this question. Let the DIALOGUE begin: For the mother's out there who are no longer with the father of your children, would you rather receive a text message from the father of your children, or nothing at all? Which is worse?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Will the REAL "Supermom" please stand up.

If you visit "The Den" often, then you know that no two posts are the same. Unlike other blogs, I don't write about just one subject. I write about whatever is on my mind, and since my thoughts are different from day to day...so are my posts.

And what's on my mind today are married women with children who whine and complain about all the work they have to do when their husbands are away.

One woman I know practically had a meltdown when her husband had to leave the country for 3 weeks, leaving her to take care of her 2 children BY HERSELF while he was away. She had to get them up in the morning, get them ready for school, get them to school, take them to their extracurricular activities, prepare dinner, etc, etc...And all of this was just too much for her.

Are you kidding me?!?

Then there's another one, who's husband is also away for a while, leaving her also to tend to their two children, and it's just wahh, wahh, wahh..."when is he coming back?"
"How am I going to get all of this done?", Yadda, Yadda, Yadda.

Well to all of you married women out there who simply fall apart at the seams when your husbands are gone, I say this: WELCOME TO MY WORLD!

I don't have the luxury of having a husband help me with raising my three children. I never have. I've had to do EVERYTHING by myself. Yeah, they "visit" with their dad, but "visiting" with someone is not the same as "living" with that person.

No...they LIVE with me. I handle their day to day affairs. BY MYSELF!

And I don't crawl up in a corner and turn to mush when there's laundry to be done, meals to cook, children to transport back & forth, etc, etc.

And OH...did I mention the fact that I have a FULL TIME JOB in addition to being a full-time mom?!?

Yes, I do all of the above AND go to work so that I can support my family so that you ,and you, and you...don't have to. I've never accepted "assistance" and pray that I never have to. I don't believe that it is YOUR job to take care of MY kids so that I can sit on the couch all day and watch talk shows.

I digress.

The bottom line is this ladies...the next time you married women with children and crying and whining and whimpering about how hard it is doing everything by yourself...try walking in my shoes. Unlike you...eventually you get to take your shoes off. I have to wear MY shoes 24/7, 365 days a year (366 in Leap Year).

So to ALL of the single mothers out there who are doin' the dag-gone thing BY YOURSELVES...I salute you.

Yes, single mothers raise children who make the Honor Roll. I am that mother.
Yes, single mothers raise children who are outstanding citizens in their communities. I am that mother.
Yes, single mothers raise their children in church where they learn about the goodness of God. I am that mother.
Yes, single mothers wish that they weren't on this journey alone, but you can't make a person do what they don't want to do. I am that mother.
Yes, single mothers raise children who do not end up in jail. I am that mother.
Yes, single mothers raise children who go to college. I am that mother.

Is the job of motherhood difficult for a married woman whose husband is away for a while? Of course it is. But the job of motherhood for a woman who has no husband to help her, today, tomorrow, or ever, is exponentially more difficult.

Let the DIALOGUE begin! What is YOUR definition of a "Supermom"?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Momma Knows Best

Today's topic was inspired by my oldest daughter Lauren.

Lauren has a friend who likes a fragrance that I wear. A few years ago I found out that the fragrance was being discontinued, so I bought up a bunch of it.

At the time, Lauren's friend Vicky mentioned that she couldn't find the fragrance anywhere. So I gave Lauren a few bottles to give to her.

The other day, Lauren mentioned that Vicky asked if I had anymore bottles. Mind you, I have a bag full 'em.

I told her yes, and that I would be happy to give Vicky a couple more. I told Lauren to take a couple bottles with her to work because that's where she normally sees Vicky.

Lauren said, "Nah...it's alright. She won't be there today. I'll take 'em another day."

So I suggested that she at least take a couple of bottles and keep them in her car, that way when she saw Vicky again (whenever the next time would be), she'd have them with her.

Lauren insisted..."No. I'm not gonna see her today, and I'm not sure when I will." They worked different shifts so they didn't see each other often.

Again, I tried to make her understand that it wouldn't hurt to have the bottles in her car...just in case.

Well, as usual, Lauren (like most kids) decided to do her own thing, which usually means NOT doing what I suggested. After all...what do I know?

Finally, I decided to stop trying to make her understand my point and went about doing other things.

So I head off to work and as soon as I get there, a text comes in from "guess who". Wanna know what it said? Think you already know? Go 'head...give it a shot...what's your guess? (I'm humming the Jeopardy theme song while you guess). Okay, time's up.

If you guessed that her text was to tell me that Vicky was THERE, then you've guessed correctly. Vicky was there, and the fragrance was not.

I quicky responded with "When are you going to learn that I know EVERYTHING and am ALWAYS right :-) One day, you'll listen".

Lauren's reply, "Yea, I know."

But I wonder...does she really?

Let the DIALOGUE begin! What did your parents warn you against, or try to tell you was right, yet you chose not to listen...only to find out later, that they were RIGHT?

Talk to me!

Til next time...