Out With The Old

So here we are...coming to the close of yet another year. A time where many reflect and select areas that they desire to change in the coming year. I, admittedly, am no different.

I won't bore you with ALL of the things that I desire to change in the coming year, however I will share this ONE, since it pertains to my lovely blog The Dialogue Den.

Gotta tell ya...there have been sooo many times when I've wanted to just let the ink run out of the pen and say, "no more," with regard to the blog. I mean...I've been at this for 6 years now, with over 690 posts, and it just hasn't taken off quite the way I had expected it to. Clearly, somethin's gotta change.

I've wondered if perhaps I should change the name from The Dialogue Den (since very few folks actually engage in DIALOGUE with me), to The Monologue Minute. Not sure if that's already taken, but it would more accurately describe the majority of my posts.

Either way...keep the name...change the name...one thing's for sure...I will NOT stop writing. Not here at the blog, nor elsewhere (with regard to the books I'm writing.)

I read a quote a while back that said:

"The worst thing you write is better than the best thing you did not write."

That pretty much summed it up for me. After all...I may not be the BEST writer who ever put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), but I am darned sure not the worst. And because my posts are as random as the kajillion thoughts that float around in my brain...some days I may write something that's "right on your street." And other days, I may write something that appears to be from a completely different planet. To that I simply say...keep reading...PLEASE (and thank you.)

Earlier this year I set a goal to write 366 posts in 2016. Well...goals are meant to be met, yet sometimes we miss. I missed. I wrote 169 posts this year. But...what happens when we miss a goal? We set a NEW one. So...you've probably already guessed that my goal for 2017 is to write 367 posts. Can I do it? Of course!

And that brings me to the photo that's posted here today.

A few weeks ago, my youngest daughter Jordan, held a toy drive for charity. In addition to spoken word artists who performed, there were also vendors (many of them around my daughter's age...early to mid 20s), selling their goods.

As much as I wished I could have purchased something from everyone, I had to be thoughtful in my decision as I had very little money and wanted to by something that would "speak to me." When I saw this beanie from The Drew League, the four words didn't just speak to me...they SCREAMED.

Yes, 2016 hit me with some MAJOR blows that I didn't expect. Yes, I am still trying to recover from them now. No...everything won't be "rainbows and butterflies" when the clock strikes midnight tonight. I will STILL be recovering from the blows of 2016. BUT...I can't let those blows stop me...or even slow me down. I can't use LAST year's troubles as an EXCUSE for this coming year not being all that should, and WILL be. LAST year (meaning 2016) will not stop me from PRODUCING in 2017. Instead, I will let the hard lessons learned from 2016 guide me toward BETTER, and more WISE decisions in 2017. And whenever I start falling into those "woe is me moments,"  I will remember the words on this beanie:

NO EXCUSE!

JUST PRODUCE!

 

Now it's YOUR turn. Let the DIALOGUE begin: Do you have a motto for the coming year? If so, let's hear it.

 

Talk to me!

 

Til next time...

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 



 



From Cover to Cover

2016 will soon come to a close and as I reflect on the events of this year, all I can say is:

I WANT BETTER!

I NEED BETTER!!

I WILL HAVE and BE BETTER!!!

Many things went wrong in 2016. Some by my own doing (which I am diligently working to repair) and others that were simply out of my control.

One area where I know I need to improve was that regarding the amount of time I spent with God in His Word. Yes, there were stretches where I was consistent and did alright, but I was not "365 days consistent." That is what I want in 2017.

I need to HEAR from God DAILY (through His Word), and He needs to hear from me DAILY (through PRAYER.)

Perhaps if I had done more of both, CONSISTENTLY, I wouldn't be in the situation I am in now.

So...here are two daily Bibles that I have attempted to get through for the past few years. My goal is to read one first thing each morning, and the other some time each evening.

God's Word is important to me and I need to start SHOWING Him instead of just TELLING Him. Isn't that how all SUCCESSFUL relationships work...by SHOWING and not just TELLING?

My relationship with God (by way of His Son, Jesus) is the MOST IMPORTANT relationship I have. I need to SHOW Him that I am serious and not just giving "lip service."

So there ya have it. I am greatly looking forward to a consistent year with God and His Word.

How 'bout you?

Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever read the Bible from Genesis 1:1 through Revelation 22:21? If not, I invite you to join in with me. We can grow in the Lord TOGETHER.

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Humbled

This morning during my daily Bible devotion I read 1 Peter 4:9 which reads (from the NLT translation):

"Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or a place to stay."

That was a real eye-opener for me and it got me to wondering just how many folks there are in my life who would actually allow me to stay in their homes (for a brief time, of course.)

I wondered because my current situation may lead me to that come January 1st. I honestly don't know how I am going to pay my rent which means that I will have to move. Move where? I have no idea. I don't even know where all of my stuff is supposed to go. Until I get a job (which I am diligently seeking DAILY), I won't be able to get a new place.

I know that I would be an exceptional "visitor." I would be sure to be up and out EARLY (probably to the nearest library) where I could continue my job search, and would only return in the evening to shower and sleep. Repeating the same routine the next day.

I wouldn't even eat any food where I'm staying because I don't want to be any more of a burden than I already would be by showering and sleeping there. I would make my presence known as little as possible.

I pray that it doesn't come down to all that, but just in case...it's really got me wondering. Who, if anyone, would open their doors to me?

Most folks would agree that I am a fairly decent person. Unfortunately, I just happen to be at a stage in my life where everything has unraveled. I know that eventually things will be nicely tied together again...it's just gonna take me a little more time. I'm trying though. Lord knows I'm trying.

So...Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever let someone (non-relative) stay in your home until they were able to get back on their feet?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

K.S. Phone Home

Yesterday on Facebook I posted the following:

Tomorrow will be a better day. I hope. I pray.

Unfortunately, today was worse.

I have a whole lot going on in my life but the worst right now is not knowing the whereabouts and well-being of a very close friend. He has simply fallen off the radar. His phone goes straight to voicemail...not just when I call, but when anyone calls...and I haven't heard from him since Sunday evening which is HIGHLY unusual.

My prayer is that he has simply "gone off the grid" for a bit to clear his head and will resurface tonight, or tomorrow at the latest.

My worst fear is so bad that I don't even want to put it in writing. My worst fear simply can not be.

So, what am I gonna do?

I imagine that the only thing left to do is to hope and pray again that tomorrow will be a better day. I hope. I pray.

Now, Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever had someone close to you suddenly disappear? If so, how long did it take for them to re-appear?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Happy Heavenly Birthday!

Today is my Mom's 66th birthday which she is celebrating in Heaven (if birthdays are even celebrated there.)

She had 63 "Earthly birthdays," and shortly before her 64th the Lord took her home.

Every year on this day I find myself wondering just what exactly do folks do in Heaven on birthdays. Maybe birthdays are just like any other day there. And maybe, just maybe...days aren't days at all. I have no idea what TIME is even like in Heaven.

Anyhoo...pictured here are where her remains lay. I never thought they'd be here in MY home. I was fine with having them at my Dad's place...but recent circumstances called for the urn to be relocated. So...here it is, and inside...there she is (at least the physical parts.)

Thankfully, I know that the true essence of my Mom can never be contained in a jar. Her soul now dwells in Heaven, full and in tact. Knowing that gives me great joy, and one of these good ol' days...I'll be right there along side of her.

With regard to MY physical remains...I would love to have my corpse placed on a bed of logs to be set afire and pushed out to sea. I find that to be the most beautiful way to lay one to rest. Legally I know it's not possible, but if it were...that's how I'd wanna be "sent off."

Nevertheless...I digress.

I said a little prayer today and asked God to give my Momma an extra special hug on this...her extra special day.

Happy 66th Birthday Mom! I love and miss you!!

Now (deep breath in)...Let the DIALOGUE begin: I know it's morbid to think about, but...how would you like for your body to be disposed of once it's time?

Talk to me!

Til nex time...

What's Your Flavor?

A couple days ago I was hankerin' for a "sweet treat." Whenever that happens I tend to find myself at Rite Aid for a scoop (or two) of some good ol' Thrifty's ice cream. Tastes good and it's way cheaper than Baskin-Robbins.

As I stood at the counter waiting for someone to come assist (there's never anyone readily available), I thought about getting my usual...either Pecan Praline or Chocolate Fudge Brownie.
Seems like it was taking longer than normal for someone to arrive which gave me time to check out some of the other flavors.

Didn't take long before I spotted one that made me smile...Rainbow Sherbet, which by the way...if you are anything like me, gets pronounced Sher-bert...even though there's only ONE "r".

Anyhoo...I digress.

The sherbet made me smile because it immediately reminded me of my Mom.

Three days before she passed away, I walked into her room and found her in tears. She knew that she didn't have many days left here on earth and was wishing that God would just " hurry up already." Yes, for this, she was quite distraught.

As I tried to calm her down, the dietician came in and noticed my Mom crying. He thought that maybe having something to eat would make her feel better. though a whole list of choices, yet nothing he mentioned sounded appealing to her and she decided that she didn't want anything at all.

Then he took a different approach and asked her what she would like to have if she could have anything at all.

My Mom's eyes lit up and she said, "Rainbow Sherbet."

I heard that and thought, "Great. Like they've really got THAT here. Now she's gonna cry again."

Well...

Much to my surprise, the dietician said, "Miss Rebecca, I'll be right back."

Not five minutes later, he walked back in with a single scoop of Rainbow Sherbet in a cup. I wish I had taken a picture of my Mom's face when she saw it. Her whole countenance changed.

I sat by her side as she ate ever so slowly, savoring every bite, almost as if she knew it would be her last time tasting. We talked, she ate. We talked, she ate.

I left that evening knowing that her tears had stopped (if only momentarily), and she enjoyed that sherbet as if it were the best thing she'd ever eaten.

So after seeing Rainbow Sherbet in the ice cream case at Rite Aid, I knew immediately what my choice would be. I asked for a single scoop in a cup, and had quite the giggle when the cup was handed to me with a SMILING scoop of sherbet (pictured) staring at me. I knew right then and there that I had most definitely made the right choice.

I savored every bite remembering how my Mom did the very same.

Now...Let the DIALOGUE begin: What's YOUR favorite flavor of ice cream?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Tender Headed

So I've been in a bit of a "hair rut" lately and needed to do something drastically different.

The choices were:

A. Cut it ALL off (as I have done several times before), and start over.
Or...
B. Get it braided (which I've only done TWICE in my entire life. Once when I was a teenager, my mom very tightly French braided it. And again when I was thirty-something, a co-worker braided it. The hair was so heavy though, I ended up taking the braids out after only one week. I know...I know...WHO DOES THAT?!?)

I went with option B.

Although it came out cute, my head hurts like the dickens. These braids are sooo tight!

I dunno. Maybe it's because I'm not used to braids that they feel tight to me, but MY GOODNESS!!!

I actually feel like my head has swollen up as a result of trauma.

It's 6:30pm and I have absolutely NO IDEA how I am ever going to go to sleep tonight. The entire surface of my scalp hurts so there is no "good side" for me to sleep on.  UGH!!!

My daughter Lauren told me that it should loosen up in about three days, or at least not hurt as much. I sure hope so!

It's funny how I have given birth three times, NATURALLY, no C-Section, no drugs...and was able to tolerate THAT pain.

THIS on the other hand...Good LAWD! Even my baby hair got braided. My BABY HAIR (non-Black folks might wanna look that up)!!!

I'm not sure if I was "tender headed" as a child (non-black folks might wanna look that up too), but as a forty-something woman, I most assuredly am.

I'd post a pic, but I don't like posting pics of myself, sooo...I can tell you that it's in about 15 French braids going back and in a right-side bun at my neck. Other than that, we'll just have to run into each other in the street somewhere so you can see it in person.

Now...Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever had you hair in braids (individual or French braids)? If so...did they hurt? And if so, for how long?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Imperfectly Beautiful

Yesterday on Facebook I posted a picture of a candleholder that I painted some years back and mentioned how candles are one of the best things about Fall.

I lit another candle earlier this evening and happened to notice that the wax was burning quite messily.

As I went to clean up the mess and dripping wax I stopped and admired the beauty of the candle...even in its messy state. That immediately reminded me of myself.

Even in the "messy state" that I am currently in, my beauty has not diminished. Even though things are caving in around me (as the candle was melting in on itself), my light is still shining.

Just like the candle, I am "imperfectly beautiful," yet for some odd reason, folks expect me to be perfect...or darn near close to it. With that being the expectation, I can tell you now that I am sure to disappoint a whole lot more folks than I already have.

Can I strive to do better? Sure.
Should I strive to do better? Sure.
Will I strive to do better? Sure.

Will I ever be perfect? No.
Should folks love me even in my "imperfectness?" Yes.
Do they? Not enough.

Nevertheless, I will keep shining just as this little candle...and even when everything around me has "melted," I'm gonna shine until the wick burns out. That's all I can do.

Now, Let the DIALOGUE begin: Do you like candles? If so, so you light them often? Is there a favorite scent that you enjoy?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Paper, No Plastic.

In all my years of voting I've never directly felt the effect of propositions I'd voted on...until yesterday.

I was at the grocery store (that I had just gone to last week) and as the cashier rang up my goods, she asked if I would need any bags. I told her yes. She then proceeded to tell me that they would be ten cents each. I furrowed my brow a bit and said, "Hmmm...I was here last week and was able to bag my items in plastic bags...for free."

She then pointed out that with the recent passing of Proposition 67, plastic bags are no longer offered and that paper bags now are, at a cost of ten cents each.

Hmph!

I went ahead and shelled out forty cents so that I could bag my items.

Turned out I only needed three.

Wasn't gonna be "cheap" and ask for a ten cent refund, but as I pondered over what to do with the extra bag, a woman across the lane from me was one bag short. Perfect. I gave her my extra and she attempted to hand me ten cents.

I proceeded to give her the bag and told her that she didn't need to pay me for it. She thanked me and I went on my merry way.

As I walked to my car I wondered if I had voted YES or NO for that particular proposition. I'm pretty sure that I voted yes due to the environmental benefit but I didn't realize that I would feel the affect so soon. Thankfully I've got about twenty reusable bags (like the one pictured) which I have rarely remembered to use in times past. Looks like that's about to change unless I wanna shell out ten cents per paper bag (which I do NOT.)

Gotta admit...I will miss plastic bags just a wee bit. Without them, I'm not sure what I will line my bathroom trash can with. That was the only thing I ever used them for. Oh well.

How 'bout you...

Let the DIALOGUE begin: What uses do you have for the grocery story plastic bags? And if you lined your bathroom trash can with them, what would you now use instead?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Over The River and Through The Woods

If  you've followed The Dialogue Den for the past few months, you know that I have been visiting various churches (and enjoying the experience.)

My last church visit was on October 9th when I visited the church that "Joe's" brother attended. That's how it ended up in my "bowl."

To date, that church had been the furthest that I had visited as it was all the way in Irvine. On my first visit, I attended the 8:00 service, and on my second visit, I attended the 10:30.

I gotta tell ya...a WHOLE LOT has happened since that last visit. That afternoon I took a nap and when I woke up, my life changed in a way that I wasn't expecting. Wish I could share what happened, and I will...in a book one day.

Anywoo...things changed.

One really big change from then to now is that Joe's brother is now the pastor of a church other than the one I visited in Irvine. I had no idea that that was coming. I'm happy for him though and know that he will do well in leading God's people. I haven't yet added his new church to my bowl yet, but one day maybe I will.

For the following three Sundays, I attended service at my own church. Again...for reasons that I can't get into right here and now, but will explain one day in a book.

After those three weeks, it was time for me to visit again. So I prayed, reached into my bowl and pulled out what has now become the furthest church. This one was in Moreno Valley. Until my visit I don't think I had ever even been to Moreno Valley.

That church made it into my bowl though because my cousin Kevin (whom I haven't seen since I was about seven years old) attends.

I arrived and as he was singing with the Praise Team, he noticed me. Once they were done singing, he came over and gave me a great big "cousin hug." It was great! I mean really...I haven't seen him in DECADES, but thanks to good ol' Facebook we were able to connect a few years ago.

I enjoyed the service and...as I always do...I went back today for my 2nd visit. I really enjoy the love that this church has for the community. They don't just "do church" inside the walls of the building, but they take church outside by serving. That's what Christ wants His followers to do.

If the church weren't so far I would definitely visit again. For now though, I can say that I'm glad I went and my soul was blessed.

If anyone is in the Moreno Valley area looking for a loving, Bible-based church to visit or join, I would recommend Renewed Life Fellowship.

Now, Let the DIALOGUE begin: How are you feeling after last Tuesday's presidential election?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

AVAILABLE!

Wow! It's been a while since I last posted.

Gotta tell ya...life has been a bit overwhelming, causing me to crawl under the proverbial "rock."

Can't say that things have gotten any better, but I know how important writing is to me, and it's one of the very few things that I can actually control, so...I'M BACK.

Yeah...the results of Tuesday's presidential election have me a bit "concerned" as I had absolutely NO IDEA that "that man" would actually pull it off and win. 

Even before the election though there were many other "concerns" on my plate. The greatest being my unemployment situation.

My goal was to be re-employed before the election as I knew that there would probably be some financial uncertainty with the economy afterward. Well...sometimes we set goals and simply don't reach them. And so...here I am...still unemployed, and seeking.

My question to YOU today is this: Will you help me? PLEASE??

Here's the deal.

I have been diligently seeking employment, have registered with more employment agencies and job recruiting sites than I can count. I have even been on a number of interviews. None of those efforts have resulted in a job offer yet.

I once heard that 80 percent of available jobs aren't even posted. That just reaffirms for me how important it is to "network." These days, the real key to getting a job is "knowing somebody." Otherwise, my resume is sitting in an electronic pile with a host of others. Unfortunately, my "network" is fairly small, however...you all know folks I don't, so I am asking you to reach out to YOUR networks (PLEASE) and SHARE this post so that perhaps someone, somewhere, who's looking for someone like me will contact me regarding a job...SOON.

Please. Don't just read this and then scroll to the next thing. Share this, PLEASE. It won't cost you a thing, yet would help me greatly.

Ideally, I'd love to work for an organization that provides services and assistance to homeless youth and their families. Unfortunately, I've never worked in that field, it's simply what my heart has a passion to do, so I've been unable to get through that particular door.

As a result, I am more than ready to get back to what I've always done (so that I can get back to paying the bills).

For those who are wondering...here are the "Cliffs Notes" version of what that is:

• Inside Sales (no cold-calling, telemarketing, "hunting") / Sales Support / Account Management (Supporting Field Reps who work outside, while I manage the accounts and assist customers on the Inside. This is what I've done well, and do best.)
• FULL TIME Permanent or FULL TIME Temp to Hire
• Within 20 miles of 90706 zip code

If you, or someone you know, are aware of any immediate opportunities that fit that criteria, PLEASE let me know. I would be happy to forward my resume to you, and/or them, for a more detailed view of my experience.

I am an excellent employee who works "smart" while bringing light and positivity to the environment. Just ask any of my former co-workers and they will gladly attest to that fact.

Ok...enough about me. It's now YOUR turn. What cha got?

Let the DIALOGUE begin: Who's hiring?

Talk to me (SOON)!

Til next time...

Over the Riverand Through the Woods

Well folks, here we are again. Another Sunday, and another Sunday that I have visited a church during my "Season of Visitation."

I enjoyed service where I worshipped today (which was also where I worshipped last Sunday.)

The church was quite welcoming, warm, friendly...and far. I think it's the farthest church I've visited yet. I just "Google Mapped" it and the distance was 32.8 miles from my home.

Aside from the fact that the message was good, (the theme was Transformation to Triumph with each of the past 3 weeks focusing on a different area of focus. The first week was, prayer. Last week was thinking. And this week was Holy living. All based on Philippians 4:1-9), I enjoyed the fact that the church's congregation is predominantly Black while the location of the church is in Orange County, which is far from being predominantly Black.

This church ended up in my "bowl" because "Joe's" brother goes there. Plus, I've heard the Pastor on the radio a few times so always knew that I wanted to visit even before knowing that Joe's brother attends.

I saw Joe's brother last week during the "Meet & Greet" portion of the service. He asked what I was doing, "way out there." I told him I was visiting...which I was.

I saw him again today (he actually greeted the visitors), but we didn't speak this time. Didn't want him to think I'm "stalking."

All in all I enjoyed the experience. I especially admire all of the work that they do in the urban communities. Although the church is located in Orange County, they do LOTS of service in areas outside of Orange County. I think that's highly commendable and exactly what Christ would want.

So, in case you're curious and would like to pay them a visit, the church was Christ Our Redeemer in Irvine. I urge you to stop by if you're in the neighborhood.

That's all for now. I look forward to where God will have me go in a couple weeks. I'll keep ya posted

Now Let the DIALOGUE begin: What's the farthest distance you've eve driven to church?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Penny (or more) For Your Thoughts

Last Saturday I had a book club meeting to attend but didn't want to drive my car due to issues that I'll write about on another day.

In order to get to the meeting via public transportation I needed to take two buses, a train, and then one more bus. No biggie. With my TAP card, I can get anywhere...and I do.

As I exited the last bus and began walking to the park where the meeting was being held I happened to notice something shiny in the grass.

I focused in on the shiny thing and noticed that it was a dime. A dime. Cool. I actually found a dime earlier today as well. But...we're not talking about today...we're talking about last Saturday.

I bent down to pick up the dime, thanked God for "the find" as I always do, and noticed a quarter near the dime. Then I spotted two more dimes, two nickels and a penny. SIXTY SIX CENTS all together!

I was baffled by finding this much change so close together.

I walk often so I'm used to finding a nickel here or a dime there, but never have they all been TOGETHER before.

Finding all that change Saturday gave me a sweet memory of my Grammy. She and I took evening walks everyday during the summers of my childhood, especially after her heart surgeries when she walked to regain her strength. I loved those walks! We would talk, laugh, and have contests to see who could find the most change along the way. Some days I won. Some days Grammy won. Even on the days when Grammy won, I was still a winner because we were together and I loved every moment spent with her. My Grammy was my very first best friend.

Oh how I miss her...her laugh...and the beautiful music she played on her organ. I'd watch her fingers glide across the keys while her feet gracefully pressed on the floor pedals.

Hernando's Hideaway, If I Were a Rich Man, and Blessed Assurance were my favorite songs. She would play them for me any time I asked.

With that said...Let the DIALOGUE begin: What's the most amount of money you've ever found while out walking? I once found a ONE HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL in a street gutter. It was a little muddy, it spent just the same as a clean one would've.

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Snapdragons to Orchids

When I was little I spent some summers visiting family in Ohio.

All these years later I still have fond memories of "lighting bugs" that came out at night and were captured in a jar...and snapdragons.

I loved the way that the "mouth" of the snapdragon opened and I would stick my finger in.

As an adult, I still like snapdragons, but new favorite flower is the orchid.

I love orchids because they last for a quite a long time.

I love orchids because of their intricate detail.

I love orchids because the require very little maintenance.

I simply LOVE orchids.

A few days ago I spotted some orchids and decided to "treat myself" and get them. I am so glad I did. They are flourishing so nicely which brings me joy because it means that they are "happy" here in my presence.

Something this pretty should be shared so I've shared a pic here with you. Hope you like it. If you click on the pic you can really see the detail that I'm talkin' 'bout. Ga'head..click on it!

How 'bout we Let the DIALOGUE begin: and you tell me...what's YOUR favorite flower?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

I Matter!

Last night I joined in on a Kingdom Love Letter ministry call not knowing what to expect...not really sure if I was expecting anything...but simply to support my friend Tonia in her Ruth & Boaz in the Meantime Ministries as she was the guest.

In a nutshell, the call was about relationships, being single, and what to do while you are single yet desiring to be in a relationship. Simple answer: Seek and Serve God. Make HIM the priority...NOT the search for a partner.

The call went on for over an hour and I attentively listened, soaking up as much knowledge as I could. When it comes to relationships, I have failed at them ALL. Hence the reason why I am STILL SINGLE. Not by choice, because my desire is to be in a MARRIAGE blessed by God. However God is waiting for me to be obedient to Him and get myself together.

Although the majority of the callers were female, I was grateful for the one or two men who joined in. As a woman, I always welcome a man's viewpoint because it helps me understand where they're coming from. I think that's important for relationships as well as basic day-to-day interactions. We need to be able to understand each other.

So I listened, listened, and listened some more until just before the call ended and the host asked if anyone had any questions or comments. I finally spoke up, shared what was on my ever-so-heavy-heart, and in return received a prophetic word of encouragement.

The call ended and my spirit was lifted. I spent time processing what was said to me and asking God to reveal to me what it all means.

This morning, Tonia let me know that her brother (who was one of the men on the call...maybe the only man, I'm not 100% sure), was praying for me. WOW!

I can not begin to tell you how much that warmed my heart. To know that somewhere out there, a MAN is actually praying FOR ME. Although he doesn't know me personally, just from my brief comment on the call, he determined that I am special, valuable, precious to God.

He may be the ONLY man who has ever prayed for me. If not the only one in times past...he is most assuredly the ONLY one praying for me NOW. As much as I would love to have MANY men praying for me as their way of saying, "You are special. You are needed. You Matter," and would especially want the man who loves me (whenever he shows up in my life) to pray for me even moreso...at this moment in time, I am ever-so-grateful for the ONE. One man's prayers are exponentially greater than the prayers of NONE.

With that said, Let the DIALOGUE begin: For all the men out there...how many women are YOU praying for today? And  do they know? I can assure you that it will absolutely put a smile on their faces to know that YOU are praying for THEM.

Talk to me...

Til next time!

I Pray for You, You Pray for Me...and Watch God Change Things!

Some time last year I saw a fantastic movie called War Room about a woman's firm belief in the power of prayer. I won't spoil it if you haven't seen it yet, but I will say that I left that movie feeling inspired. My faith in prayer had been strengthened.

Unlike the woman in the movie who had an actual ROOM where she would write, and keep her prayer requests to God...I live in a teeny tiny apartment and there simply are no "extra" rooms. There's not even an "extra" closet.

Still...I wanted to do what the woman in the movie did. I wanted to WRITE my requests to God and be able to VISIBLY see them. This would serve two purposes. ONE...the requests would more easily stay at the forefront of my mind (especially for folks who I am praying on behalf of...it's so important for me to keep them at the forefront of my mind), and TWO...it allows me to easily see the prayers that God has answered. Y'all do know that He answers prayers, right?

After some thought I decided that the back of my bedroom door would be become my "War Space" where I would tape my prayers.

I did this for about a week and got oddly nervous. For some reason, I became uncomfortable about having my prayers "out there" in the open. Weird...I know. So I decided instead to write them down in a journal. So my "War Room", which had been downsized to a "War Space" was now a "War Journal." Ok. No, not ok.

Here's what happened.

I wrote prayers in my "War Journal" for a while, then stopped. Then I'd start. Then stop. There was no consistency, and I rarely looked back at the prayers I'd written down. Totally defeating the purpose!

Well...

Lately I've been having far more "talks with God" than usual. I am in an extremely difficult "season" right now and just don't feel like I hear Him, nor is He hearing me. I don't see Him "moving." THAT's gotta change!

So...last night, or should I say this morning since it was around 1:00 am...I was strongly compelled to write my petitions to God...each one on it's own piece of paper...and tape them to my bedroom WALL.

My pen was smokin'!

Prayer after prayer just started to flow. They weren't ALL requests. Some were prayers of THANKS. I even added some Scriptures as I was led to them. As a result...I now have a "War WALL." WOW!!! And since there are FOUR walls in my room, I just might fill 'em all up.

After I taped the last of last night's prayers I just sat, looked, and read them all. Again, I had another "talk with God" letting Him know that I have done my part by making my requests known. Now I wait in expectancy, KNOWING that I serve a God who can not fail, and is able to do abundantly above all that I can ask or think. In other words, God's Got This!

I woke up this morning, looked over at my wall, read my daily Word, then read each and every prayer. It felt great. I could feel a shift.

I now look forward to checking off those prayers as they are answered...one by one...not in my chronos time, but in His kairos time. His timing is always perfect.

Now Let the DIALOGUE begin: Is there something I can pray for on your behalf? I would be honored to add your request to my "War Wall."

"Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." - James 5:16

Talk to me!

Til next time...

The Fruit of Friendship

I was at the store yesterday and passed by a bin full of persimmons which quickly reminded me that yes, it is indeed "persimmon season."

I love persimmons!

For those who are wondering what a persimmon taste like, well, they have a flavor all their own. But if I had to make a comparison, I would say that they taste like a cantaloupe and an apple had a baby.

Although they look like tomatoes, they are actually firm (like apples) and sweet (like cantaloupe).

Persimmon season is now a bit bittersweet time for me.

I love the fruit, yet it brings back reminders of the "best friend" I once had, yet haven't heard from in almost a year now.

Her parents had a persimmon tree in their backyard and would graciously pick them for me. That is how and where I got my first taste.

As I just mentioned, I haven't heard from my former "best friend" in almost a year, so it's pretty much guaranteed that the only persimmons I will be enjoying this season are the ones I buy from the store.

As for the friendship, I have said this a number of times before. If she were to call me, or show up at my door today...I would welcome her with open arms and we could start over. That simple act would let me know that she actually does value me and our friendship, more than she values being "right" even in a situation where she was clearly WRONG.

And for those who are saying, "How 'bout YOU be the 'bigger person' and call HER, or show up at HER door?" (I know y'all are saying that), I did...a number of times. My attempts were ignored. Maybe I'm not the best person to say this because of course I'm a bit biased, but I think I'm a decent enough person that I don't have to beg for anyone to "be my friend." Maybe folks who know me would be able to attest to than better that I, with less bias.

So there ya have it. Welcome to "Persimmon Season!"

Now Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever tried a food that looked unusual and then ended up LOVING it?

Talk to me (while I go eat a couple persimmons)!

Til next time...

'Nuff Said

Three Letter Word

After yesterday's inspiring event, my heart is still full.

One of the things that Shannon told us yesterday is that we have to be willing to say YES to God. That means YES to the things that we need to release so that He can bless us. And YES to the things that we want to receive.

Such a simple little word.

One syllable.

Three letters.

YES.

There's a song by the same name that I have listened to many times since yesterday's event. I listened to it this morning after I read my Bible and will listen to it again before I go to bed. It has become my "meditation song."

I didn't have the best day today, seems like I faced many obstacles. Yet I remain faithful in knowing that God is going to turn this thing around for my good. Until He does, my heart, my mind, and my mouth will continue to say:

YES

How 'bout you? Let the DIALOGUE begin: Do you have a "meditation song?" If so, what is it?

Talk to me! Oh, but close your eyes and listen to this song first.



Til next time...

Exit Here

Earlier today I attended a powerfully inspiring event that reaffirmed my desire to LIVE in my PURPOSE.

Very few folks know my current situation yet one thing I can say with certainty is that it in NO WAY resembles what I'm supposed to be doing and where I want to be in life. At this point, my current situation and my PURPOSE are polar opposites. That's heartbreaking.

During the event there were so very many things said that made me want to burst into tears. Somewhere along this journey of mine I have become a bit stoic, so I suppressed pretty much every tear that tried to fall. That was until...

The event ended, thanked the host Shannon Yvette and headed to my car.

As soon as I got in the first tear was allowed to fall. That one was followed by countless more.

I started my car, turned off the radio and began my tear-filled chat with God.

The gist of the conversation was around my disappointment at where I am at this point in my life. How I am desperately seeking a career opportunity that will allow me to help others as my heart so greatly desires, yet I feel that I am failing because it just hasn't manifested itself yet and I am simply LOST.

So I'm having this heartfelt talk with God and get on the freeway.

Once I get on I realize that I need to quickly moved into the lane to my left otherwise I will end up exiting the freeway. Not what I wanted to do.

So I'm still pleading with God, tying to figure out why nothing I've done thus far has had any meaning or value. No one's life has been positively changed as a result of my interaction.

The tears fell even quicker.

And no one was letting me get over.

So...I angrily ended up exiting the freeway. Great! Now I'm crying and angry at the same time.

I get to the bottom of the off-ramp and there's a homeless person standing there with a  sign. I reached over to my passenger seat and gave them the prepared "blessing bag" that I keep in my car for such occasions. Then I circled the block so that I could get back on the freeway.

About thirty seconds into my circling the "light bulb" went off and I said, "Ok God. I see what you did there."

Even though my plan was to get on the freeway and go straight home...God's plan was for me to get off at the "wrong" exit so that I could be a blessing to someone who otherwise may not have been. It was as if God was saying, "I hear you and YES...you ARE living in your PURPOSE...even NOW. No, this isn't ALL that I have destined you for, but as long as you keep doing what you can with what you've got...even though you feel LOST and that NOTHING is making an impact...the little things that you do 'in the meantime' ARE making an impact."

At that point the tears stopped falling.

I get it.

I need to keep working toward where I'm trying to go, and I need to be patient in the process.

Am I where I want to be yet in this journey called "life"? NO.
Am I doing little things along the way as I strive to get there? "YES.

What exactly is it that I ultimately want to do with this life of mine? I'm glad you asked. Here's the list:

• Write books
• Become a Motivation Speaker (with a specific focus)
• Create a Non-Profit Organization that promotes literacy
• Work for (or create) an organization that provides services to homeless youth and their families

That all sounds pretty well and good, right? The interesting thing is that "career wise," I have never done any of the above, yet my heart SCREAMS to do them all. I pray that one day, I will. Dear Lord, PLEASE!

Now...it's late, so Let the DIALOGUE begin: What (if anything) is holding you back from doing what you know you were created to do? Let's work on it together.

Talk to me!

Til next time...