MY Son

What an emotional whirlwind these past two days have been with the recent SENSELESS killings of yet two more Black men. As a mother of an 18 year old Black male I don't know what to feel, and then again, I seem to be feeling EVERYTHING.

What I do know is that I LOVE MY SON and want him to have the BEST that life has to offer. I want him to have an EQUAL opportunity to HAVE and DO things that "other" males his age have to opportunity to HAVE and DO.

As I was scrolling through Facebook this evening I came across an INCREDIBLY moving post from a friend who wanted to "tell her son's story" in its truth so that the media wouldn't have an opportunity to twist it in the event that any harm ever befalls him.

As a result, I too have been compelled to tell MY son's story.

Even BEFORE he was born, my son was special.

Four months into my pregnancy a series of tests were run and it was determined that he would be born with some "issues." After being told the news, I asked my doctor what could be done. His response was, "Nothing." He then gave me the option to terminate my pregnancy as the only "option." Well...THAT wasn't an option. PRAYER was. And for the remainder of my pregnancy I prayed for my baby boy, and prayed for God to give ME whatever I would need in order to care for a child with the "issues" my baby was going to have (according to the doctor.)

Five months later, I gave birth to a blessed baby boy who was just as healthy as his two sisters who came before him. He was born without a SINGLE issue that the prenatal tests "predicted" he'd have. That alone was enough to prove how GREAT this baby boy would grow to become.

So, where do I begin?

He is a voracious reader...always has been. As a result, he has become an EXCELLENT writer.
He is an AMAZING artist. I mean really...you should see some of the stuff he's drawn.
He is kind, intelligent, and doesn't fit into any anyone's "box." That's just one of the many things I love about him.
He is a law-abiding citizen and has NEVER been in any criminal trouble...EVER.
He is an INCREDIBLY TALENTED robotics engineer who loves building "gizmos and gadgets."
He is an OUTSTANDING orator.
Most importantly, He loves the Lord, attends church regularly, and knows God's Word.
He's simply an all-around "cool dude." And I don't just say this because I am his mother. I say this because it's who he is. Anyone who knows him will tell you the same, and would surely ADD to this list.

There is no alternative narrative. This is Terence's story...

I purposefully ended with the ellipses because he's got a whole lotta living to do, so his story still has more to be added...much much MORE.

My prayer is that no one EVER has to read this in order to find out who he "was", because I don't ever want him to be a "was."

I have written this because I want the world to know who he "IS."

Got My Wheels Spinnin'

When I was young, my friends and I liked to hang out at the roller skating rink...especially during our teenage years. The skating rink was the SPOT.

We had two that we'd frequent. World On Wheels in L.A., and Skate Depot in Cerritos. Both are now closed.

But the past time of roller skating is alive and well. My 22 year old daughter goes weekly. Unfortunately, the closet spot is in Orange County. So...that's where EVERYBODY goes now.

Last night I sent her a text to see what she was up to and she told me that she was out skating with friends. I told her to be safe (as I always do...just 'cause that's what us Moms do) and went to sleep.

Well I woke up this morning to find out that there was a shooting at the skating rink where she was. Everyone was searched over a three hour period as the police looked for the shooter (which they never found.)

Thankfully, my daughter and her friend were safe. But it made me wonder about a few things.

When did we come such a VIOLENT society?

When I was younger, my friends and I hung out "without incident." The worst that would EVER happen was a possible FIST fight. But all this gun violence??? When did that start?

I sometimes wonder if the best years for being young ENDED when I was young.

I think about my 18 year old son now and how UNSAFE it is for him to even walk down the street as a young male Black.

To the police, he's a threat.
To other young men his age, he's a threat.
As his MOTHER, I know that he's not a threat to EITHER.

He is a law-abiding citizen with a good head on his shoulders...but you'd have to actually KNOW him to KNOW that. The Police and random young men my son's age, DON'T know him. So for that reason, I must keep him CONSTANTLY covered in PRAYER.

Texting my daughter, instinctively telling her to be safe, and then seeing how close she was to danger also made me even more aware of the fact that we just never know when our communication with someone will be the last.

Thankfully, that wasn't the LAST communication for us. But for those friends and families of the victims in Orlando last month...it was. Or for the friends and family who've been victims of mass shootings...for them, it was. And for those who've texted loved ones as they're leaving work at the end of the day, "On my way home. Love you."...yet ended up in a fatal car accident. For those folks, that was their LAST communication. There are so many other examples that I could list.

Bottom line is this, we just never know. And that's all the more reason to LOVE each other while we can...because we simply don't know how long we will have them, or they us.

So on this "30 Days of THANKFULNESS: Day 23" - I am THANKFUL that God has allowed me another day to tell my kiddos that I love them.

Now it's YOUR turn. Let the DIALOGUE begin: When was the last time you went roller skating?

While you think about that, here's a song for ya!


Talk to me!

Til next time...