What's she doing???

On March 1st of this year I got what's called "The Big Chop." That means that I went to the barber shop, hopped in the chair and told the barber to take it all off. He did.

My hair wasn't even an inch long after the chop. It may have been 1/4 of an inch long, but not much longer than that.

Now we fast forward 4 months.

My hair has grown. It's at least an inch long, probably longer. And it's what I call "kinky-coily". Not really curly, but a cross between kinky and coily.

This texture has caused me to form a bad habit. I am CONSTANTLY uncoiling the kinks. CONSTANTLY. I do this so much I think I may have created a bald patch right smack dab in the middle of my head. That is where my hair is the kinkiest-coiliest. A completely different texture from the rest of my hair. Weird!

The hair at the back and toward the nape of my neck is very soft and more of a coily-curly texture. Toward the front, the hair is like sheep's wool. And that patch in the middle has gone completely back to Africa!

So...I find myself uncoiling the kinks when I'm waiting for a light to change, when I'm at my desk making calls, and when I'm just sittin' at home on the couch chillin'.

It's a bad habit for two reasons. One, because I'm creating that bald patch, and two, because I must look ridiculous to those who catch me doing it.

I do it because it's a stress reliever. When I'm uncoiling my kinks I completely zone out. It's like smoking a cigarette or sippin' on a drink. Just calming.

I imagine I'll stop once I go back to straightening my hair again, which won't be until March 1, 2014. There's a lot of uncoiliing to do between now and then ;-)

Now...Let the DIALOGUE begin: Describe one of your bad habits and why you secretly get joy out of it.

Talk to me

!

Til next time...

***Post# 6 inspired by the book "642 Things to Write About" ***

Esperanza Bridge

***Read all the way through to the end***

"Come ye disconsolate, where’re ye languish your mind..."

Those were the words that Francis heard the choir singing as she stepped inside the doors of the church for what was the 1st time in 30 years.

She wasn’t even sure how she'd ended up there. Life for Francis lately had become a blur. One day blurred right into the next. She hadn’t been living, she’d only been functioning. Not much of an existence there, Francis thought.

And on more than one occasion, she’d thought about giving up on existing altogether. Just didn’t see the point anymore.

The life that Francis was living was far from the life she’d planned.

She’d never been married (not by choice).

She’d never had any children (not by choice either, she was simply waiting for the right order which meant having a husband first).

She lived in a small studio apartment, by herself. Couldn’t even have a pet because the property management company wouldn’t allow it.

She had a job that was just that…a “j-o-b”. Nothing thrilling about it. Nothing lifechanging , neither for herself nor her company’s clients.

She knew that she was created for more and just couldn't find a way to get there.

Life had gotten in the way of Francis’ dreams and goals. Life was suffocating Francis. Life, didn’t seem to be much of a friend. So she decided to end the friendship.

“Who will even miss me when I’m gone? If anyone really cared, they’d be here. Life wasn’t meant to be lived alone and since I’m alone and probably will continue to be, then why bother with living.”

Francis had made the ultimate decision to leave this life that had been so unkind to her. Today was going to be the day.

She stepped out of her front door, felt the heat of the sun against her face and for a brief moment, actually smiled. It was as though the sun was giving her one last hug, knowing that it would never shine on her face again.

She started walking toward the Esparanza Bridge. Not nervous. Not distraught. Focused.

These were the last 8 blocks she would ever walk. No turning back now. She put one foot in front of the other and off she went.

Along the first block she passed by Gionelli's, her favorite restaurant.
Block number two, the elementary school that she had attended as a young girl.
Along block number three was the museum where Francis spent countless hours admiring the lovely oil paintings, sketches, and sculptures.
Block four was where she spent her childhood. The home where her family used to live was on this block.
As soon as she crossed the street to block number five she could smell the freshly cut flowers displayed outside of her favorite flower shop.
Block number six contained the market where she shopped. So convenient and the walk was always a great way to get in some exercise.

And then...block number seven. Just one block away from what would be the last.
As soon as she stepped foot on block number seven, she heard those words resounding from the church. "Come ye disconsolate, where’re ye languish your mind..." It was as if the choir was singing just for her...only TO her.

"Come ye disconsolate, where'er ye languish your mind.
Come to the mercy seat, fervently kneel;
here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish,
earth, oh, has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal..."

At that moment she realized that her journey was over. No, not her life's journey, but the journey to end her life. She stepped inside the church doors and let the words of the song pierce her heart, her "saddened, lonely, been hurt too many times by too many people" heart. What seemed to be an endless stream of tears flowed down her face. And as she sat there in her seat a woman came over, didn't say a word, and just placed her arm around Francis. A loving, caring arm. A gesture that said, "you're not alone. Someone DOES care."

Many times that's the difference between whether someone feels that this life is worth living, or if they decide to give it all up. Most times, someone just needs to know that somebody else CARES.

***
Phew! That was another toughy. My 5th post inspired by the book "642 Things to Write About" Another creative challenge that I had to take head on. The instructions were: Put you iPod on random shuffle, write down the lyric of the first song that comes on, and use it as an opening line.

Let the DIALOGUE begin: How'd I do? Did you think Francis wasn't gonna make it? How 'bout YOU give it a try and let me know what you come up with for the first song that comes up in YOUR shuffle.

Talk to me!

Til next time.

What just happened?

How 'bout that. Something just happened and you missed it.
Hey, something else just happened and you missed it again.

Yes, in the second between that first and last sentence something happened. What exactly? I couldn't tell you. What I will do is answer today's topic from "642 Things to Write About" which is: What can happen in a second

I'm a person who likes to do things in 7s, so I will list 7 things that can happen in a second.

1. Blink our eyes
2. Win or lose a close race
3. An accident

4. Power outage
5. Death
6. Make a decision
7. This is my FAVORITE. We can be "raptured", "caught up" whatever you wanna call it...to meet Jesus when He comes back for His believers. THAT will be the BEST second of my LIFE!

Now it's YOUR turn. Let the DIALOGUE begin: You don't have to list 7, but how 'bout you list 1. What can happen in a second?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Creatively Challenged

It was a smoldering 98 degrees in Beauteria. Too hot to stay inside without A/C and too hot to be outside unless you were in the water.

Le-A (pronounced Le-dash-uh) decided to venture out and take a dip in Lake Noentres.

She put on her swim gear and headed out into the blazing heat. So hot that it almost blew her right back inside. Almost.

She hopped in her car, cranked up the tunes and made her way to Lake Noentres.

When she arrived she was oddly surprised to find that on such a scorching hot day as this, there was no one else at the lake.

“Sweet! I’ve got the place all to myself.”

She started toward the water and once she got there realized that she had her glasses on. She didn’t want to get in with them for fear that they may slip off of her face. Her glasses were her eyes. Without ‘em, she couldn’t see a thing. And because of a medical eye condition, she couldn’t wear contacts. Just one of life’s little inconveniences.

Since she was the only one there she thought it was safe enough to leave the glasses on a nearby tree branch. Close enough that she didn’t have to go all the way back to the car, and far enough away from the water.

So she left the glasses and very cautiously headed back toward the water.

She stuck her toe in, then a foot, and before she knew it she was up to her neck in water. So refreshing on such a blistering hot day. Coming to Lake Noentres was definitely a good choice. Or was it?

Time passed, and then some more. She wasn’t sure how long she’d been out in the water. And then…she heard something. She looked around and couldn’t make out a dog-gon thing. Her glasses were on that branch that now seemed miles away.

She heard another noise. This one louder than the first, and closer.

She squinted, trying her best to make out whatever it was.

Was it a dog? She couldn't tell. Seemed bigger than a dog though.
An alligator?
Not likely. This is Beauteria. Not many alligators roaming around there.
A bear?
Could've been. Seemed tall enough.

Panic began to settle in. Maybe this wasn’t the best choice after all.

Noises got louder and NOW there was something IN the water with her. Le-A started freaking out. Splashing frantically trying to get away. But from what? Whatever it was, splashed even louder, and was coming closer. The ominous figure was halfway between the water’s edge and where she was in the water. It was coming right at her!

Le-A was beginning to realize why nobody else was at the lake. It wasn’t safe. Apparently everybody else knew this. She obviously didn’t get the memo.

Without her glasses she couldn't make out which way to go or what to do. She was stuck. And it (whatever "it" was) was quickly approaching.

She decided that her only chance of escape would be to go UNDER the water, out of sight of whatever was coming toward her. And then what?

Where would she go if she couldn't see in front of her?

She had to try.

Le-A took a deep breath and just as she was about to go under, she heard a familiar voice calling out to her. That voice belonged to Lamar, her next door neighbor.

"Woman, what are you doin' out here all by yourself? You know that's not safe! What if somethin' happened to you? And what are you doin' out here without your glasses on? Leavin' em in a tree for who knows what to get. You know you can't see without your glasses. Follow me and let's get outta here. It's hot!"

***

Okay. So that was my 3rd post inspired by the book "642 Things to Write About". Really LOVING this book! Today's topic was: Your character is swimming in a lake, not wearing her glasses. She squints at a shape coming toward her in the water. What does she think she sees?

This was challenging for me because I typically write from experiences or opinion, not creatively. This forced be creative and I'm glad that I took it on.

Now Let the DIALOGUE begin: How did I do? Was it suspenseful? Were you hoping that she'd get eaten up by something?

Talk to me!

Til next time.

And the Winner is...

The year was 1980. The month was May. The day, a Friday afternoon.

As we were being dismissed from school I asked my friend Monique what she was doing for the weekend. She told me that she was going to see a movie.

“Which one?”, I asked.

“Fang.”

“Fang? I’ve never heard of that. Is it scary?”

“Not Fang. FAME. It’s about some kids who sing and dance at a school."

“Ohh. That sounds GOOD.”

***

I was eleven years old and had no idea then that I had just been introduced to the film that would become my favorite.

I don’t remember who took me to see it. It was rated "R" so somebody must’ve, unless I snuck in. Knowing me...I didn’t sneak in.

Watching Fame was like seeing MYSELF on screen. I WAS COCO! Just a girl wanting to share her talents with the world. Yes! She was me…I was her.
Even at the age of eleven I wanted to be a star. I sang in high school and loved every performance. I was the soloist at my high school graduation and was this close to going to Berklee College of Music. Yes folks, I wanted to be a star. Thirty four years later, I still do. Not so much now in the sense of performing on stage, but in the sense that I want to leave my mark on the world.

Although Coco was my favorite character, Leroy Johnson and Ms. Lydia Grant ranked pretty high as well.

I loved the way that Leroy was introduced to us.
He was just at the audition to be the dance partner for his friend who was the actual auditionee. Once Leroy got movin’ though, he danced circles around his friend. Totally outshined her. In the words of Ms. Lydia Grant, he was “wicked” (or at least his dancing was). And in his own words, “ I's young, I's single, and I loves to mingle! .” Yes sir, I loved me some Leroy!

As for Ms. Grant, she was a “no nonsense” kind of teacher who pushed until she got the very best out of her students. She made it plain, “ You've got big dreams. You want fame. Well, fame costs. And right here is where you start paying: in sweat.”

I feel like I’ve been sweating all my life. Not so much physically, but in many other ways. Yes, my dreams are big and I deposit a little more into them each day. One day all of this sweat will pay off. I have to keep believing that otherise I'll quit, and quitting is simply NOT an option.

Now for anyone who knows me AT ALL, this next part will come as no surprise. I LOVED the singing in Fame. I’m sure that if you asked, I could belt out any of the tunes, but my top 3 favorite songs are:

Out Here on My Own

Hot Lunch Jam

and

I Sing The Body Electric

When those three come on…watch out, ‘cause it’s ON!

So there you have it. Fame. My favorite film.

What I find most interesting is that Fame is technically a musical, and I typically hate watching musicals on screen. Moulin Rouge…didn’t like it. Chicago…didn’t like it. Les Miserable…won’t even see it on film because I already know…I won’t like it. I enjoy musicals best when performed LIVE on stage. Somehow, Fame is my only exception. I couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve seen it. There've been too many to count. What I can tell you is that anytime it comes on TV, I watch. And I love it, EVERY time.

"Sometimes I wonder where I've been
Who I am
Do I fit in.
Make believin' is hard alone,
Out here on my own

We're always provin' who we are
Always reachin' for the risin' star
To guide me far
And shine me home
Out here on my own..."

Now, Let the DIALOGUE begin: What is YOUR favorite film?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

x+y=?

Today's post is the first of 642 posts that I'll be sharing here in The Dialogue Den. All will be inspired by the FABULOUS book I received yesterday from my BFF Judy. The book is titled, "642 Things To Write About". Enjoy!
***

Write down everything you can remember about your algebra teacher

Mr. Yamaguchi.

I’d like to say that his first name was Ken, but I’m not 100% sure. The last name though, I know that’s correct. He was my algebra teacher at Banning High. A very kind and patient man. Slender and about 50 years old.

Algebra was my 1st period class and I was habitually tardy. I rode the city bus to school so if I missed the bus, or if it was too full and passed me up, I’d be late. Eventually I would arrive and rush upstairs to his class. I sat in the 2nd row from the door, last seat in the back. As soon as I’d sit down he would greet me with, “You’re late.” I couldn't even respond. I would simply scramble to find out what page we were on and try to catch up.

I’ve always struggled with math and really enjoyed him as a teacher because he would go over a problem as many times as needed until we “got it.”
He really loved math. It not only showed in the fact that he was so patient, but also in the fact that his son chose to follow in his footsteps and became a math teacher at the same high school.

Mr. Yamaguchi.

That’s all I remember but considering the fact that this memory is over two decades old, I’d say I did pretty well.

Now it’s YOUR turn.

Let the DIALOGUE begin: Write down everything YOU can remember about your algebra teacher.

Talk to me!

Til next time…

It's MY Birthday and I'll do what I want to!

Yes folks, today is my birthday. And a wonderful birthday it has been!

It began with church service where my best friend (of 36 years) attended because that was my special birthday request. No,church isn't her thing, but for ONE day out of the year she was willing to do something that's not her thing, because it is MY thing.
Seeing her there made me happy. And that happiness superceded the disappointment that I felt over the fact that my other best friend (of 33 years)was not there. No, church isn't her thing either, but for me, you'd've thunk she would make an exception. And maybe she would have if it weren't for the 15 mile bike ride that we were originally going to do to celebrate my day.

Yes, I was excited about the ride. Yes, she registered and paid for it. And yes, I let her know that we weren't going to be doing the ride afterall because I would rather be at church. Yes...church is where I wanted to be on MY birthday.

So I send the first text letting her know about the cancellation. Crickets. No reply.
I send a 2nd text to make sure that she got the 1st. Crickets again.
Ok...I guess you're mad.
I didn't call because I hate confrontation and I hate having people over talk me without letting me get my point out. So...my preferred method of communication in situations like theses is a letter. And that's what I did.

I wrote her a letter and enclosed a check to reimburse her for the registration fee. You'd think that would settle the issue. Well...apparently not. She hasn't responded to my letter nor did she wish me a happy birthday.
First time in 33 years. I guess it's like they say...there's a first time for everything.

So...who knows? Is this the end of a 33 year friendship? I would hope not, but the ball is clearly in her court. I gotta admit, I'm baffled by the whole thing. I mean really! I could understand if I were messin' around with her man, or lied to her, or did something MAJOR like that. But change MY plans for MY birthday, and for THAT she's angry?!? I just don't get it.

But I'm at a point in my life where I can't worry about it. I can't change her heart or mind. After 45 years I have been "thrown away" by so many people that being "thrown away" by one more won't really make a difference. No, I never thought that SHE of all people would through me away, but maybe my shelf life of friendship was up. Who really knows? Until she begins talking to me again (if she ever does), I'll never know.

And please, don't tell me to "be the bigger person" and CALL her. I have been the "bigger person" for 45 years, asking people to "come back" over stuff that wasn't even my fault. I'm tired! Either I have value, or I don't. That's it. That's all.

So, as the title of the post says, "It's MY Birthday and I'll do what I want to!" I've done what I wanted and I've had a fabulous 45th birthday!

Let the DIALOGUE begin

: Have you ever lost a friendship because you changed YOUR birthday plans?

Talk to me!

Til next time...