When is enough enough? When is too much too much? When it comes to FB and all this social media, I'll quote my kids by saying "T.M.I."!!! And if I had to sum it up in ONE word I'd say this...BLEHK!!!
It really is too much. Don't people know anything about filters? Is there REALLY a need to share EVERYTHING???
Do we really need to know what you ate today, with pics included?
Do we really need to watch the online argument taking place between you and "friend X"?
Do we need to know that you just burped or farted?
Do we really need to know that you've gone from being "in a relationship" to "single"? And then watch you pour your heart out and mourn ON FB?
Do we???
Interestingly, every one of the updates mentioned above would be sure to ring in a string of comments. But post something that could change a person's life for the better, and there won't be a comment in sight. Crickets.
Maybe I'm too private of a person. Maybe I need to open up more. Then again...maybe not.
Just seems to me like people are gonna get themselves in a whole lotta trouble if they keep airing their dirty laundry for all the world to see. How much is too much?
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Are you hooked into any form of social media? If so, do you share EVERYTHING, or do you keep SOME things to yourself?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Monday, June 13, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
To Hide or Not to Hide...
Today I had to hide another "friend" on FB. I'll call this "friend" Sam.
I didn't want to, but I was uncomfortable with Sam's posts. Sam has chosen to go through a therapeutic healing session on FB and I don't know how to respond. I'm not even sure if I'm supposed to respond. I mean really, what is the response to someone who's opening up the closet of their life ON FB???
Perhaps I'm just waaay too private of a person and choose to only share my most private feelings with my closest friends. I have two such friends with whom I can share anything and everything, without judgement, and they are still my friends. But that's it. There are ONLY two!
Now I totally get the fact that what one posts on FB is purely their choice. There really aren't any rules or guidelines. After all, the question is "What's on your mind?" So...people answer the question. Sometimes, all too honestly.
I imagine that posting one's feelings on FB and getting feedback from "friends" is a whole lot cheaper than going to an actual therapist, but geez Louise. Is FB really the place?
I guess it all boils down to how one chooses to use their page. Me, I keep it positive. I'm there to uplift, encourage, make people laugh every now and then, share the good things that are happening in my life. I rarely (if ever) use it as a tool to bring people down. The world will do that on it's own.
So to Sam who has chosen to publicly work through issues of Sam's childhood, I wish you well and hope that your journey leads you to a place of wellness, I really do. I'm just a bit uncomfortable being along on the journey. And therein lies one of the benefits of FB...I can "hide" someone when I need to, and "unhide" when I think it's "safe to go back into the water".
Who knows...maybe some of my "friends" have hidden me. Not everybody can handle positivity. Some people find it downright boring. And you just don't find any "drama" on my page, which is what a lot of people tune in for.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Have you had to hide anyone on FB? If so, why?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
I didn't want to, but I was uncomfortable with Sam's posts. Sam has chosen to go through a therapeutic healing session on FB and I don't know how to respond. I'm not even sure if I'm supposed to respond. I mean really, what is the response to someone who's opening up the closet of their life ON FB???
Perhaps I'm just waaay too private of a person and choose to only share my most private feelings with my closest friends. I have two such friends with whom I can share anything and everything, without judgement, and they are still my friends. But that's it. There are ONLY two!
Now I totally get the fact that what one posts on FB is purely their choice. There really aren't any rules or guidelines. After all, the question is "What's on your mind?" So...people answer the question. Sometimes, all too honestly.
I imagine that posting one's feelings on FB and getting feedback from "friends" is a whole lot cheaper than going to an actual therapist, but geez Louise. Is FB really the place?
I guess it all boils down to how one chooses to use their page. Me, I keep it positive. I'm there to uplift, encourage, make people laugh every now and then, share the good things that are happening in my life. I rarely (if ever) use it as a tool to bring people down. The world will do that on it's own.
So to Sam who has chosen to publicly work through issues of Sam's childhood, I wish you well and hope that your journey leads you to a place of wellness, I really do. I'm just a bit uncomfortable being along on the journey. And therein lies one of the benefits of FB...I can "hide" someone when I need to, and "unhide" when I think it's "safe to go back into the water".
Who knows...maybe some of my "friends" have hidden me. Not everybody can handle positivity. Some people find it downright boring. And you just don't find any "drama" on my page, which is what a lot of people tune in for.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Have you had to hide anyone on FB? If so, why?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Friday, June 10, 2011
TO Me, FROM Me, With LOVE
Today at work I received a very yummy box of chocolate covered strawberries. Dee-lish!
Was I surprised when they showed up? Not one bit. Why not? Because I sent them to myself.
No, not as a ploy to make people think that there's a "special someone" in my life. I sent them because I've always wanted them.
So...instead of waiting for someone to send me chocolate covered strawberries, I decided to send them to myself.
Now if you've followed the blog for any time at all, you know that I am a single woman who would love to no longer be single, yet, there aren't any prospects, therefore, there's no guarantee when or even if that special someone will come along.
So until he does show up, I'm going to love myself the way that I deserve to be loved.
And you know what...who better to love me, than ME.
I know what I like.
I enjoy my own company.
I appreciate me for me.
And it got me thinking about all of the women (an possibly men also) who are wasting their lives waiting for someone to come along and shower them with gifts, make them feel valued, take them to the places they like, etc. But what if that person never shows up? Why deprive yourself of the things that make you happy just because you don't have anyone to share those things with.
Me...I've gone to concerts alone, and have enjoyed myself immensely. I've dined alone and savored the meal completely. I've seen movies alone, and enjoyed every scene because there was no one for me to talk to throughout the movie (those who've seen movies with me know how much I talk through movies). And for the first time...I've sent myself chocolate covered strawberries. Shared them with the kiddies, and enjoyed every bite.
You see, my friends...I am living a live with NO regrets. No could've, should've, would'ves for me. God gave me this life, and I am going to LIVE it. Do I want to live it "companion-less"? Of course not! Does life go on even if a companion (a.k.a. husband) never comes along? Most certainly, yes!
And for all of you out there who are journeying through this life "solo", to you I say this...LIVE your life! Enjoy it! Treat yourself to the things that make you happy. You're worth it!
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Have you ever sent anything to yourself? Flowers, candy, chocolate? Did you send it and tell others that it came from someone else, or did you proudly reveal that the goodies were "self sent".
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
HopeFULL
This one is pretty long, but well worth reading. So grab a cup of coffee if you must, and get comfortable. You're gonna be in The Den for a while.
***
On Monday, one of my coworkers told me that her son's former Spanish teacher died. It was very sudden and no one knew yet what had happened.
Later that afternoon it was confirmed that she had committed suicide.
We all just shook our heads. Regardless of whether we knew her or not, it's just so sad when someone is in such despair that the only way out (at least in their mind) is to end it all.
Many would look at my life and possibly decide that it is a life not worth living. At the very least, no one's lining up to trade their lives for mine. I'm single, raising 3 kids on very little money, living in an apartment that is far too small, driving the cheapest car on the market. I'm fat. I'm Black. And the possibility of anyone loving me is slim to none. No my friends, not many people would trade their lives for mine.
Yet I wouldn't trade my life for anyone else's, and I surely wouldn't end it.
Yes, I'm single and although my choice would be to journey through this life with that special man, I'm well aware of the fact that I entered this life alone, and I'll exit alone. So in the meantime, I'm going to do all that I can to make this a life worth living.
Yes, I have very little money. But I know what it's like to have even less. I truly know what it means to have 10 cents to my name, because I've had days where all I had (in the bank and in my pocket) was only 10 cents. But I lived that day with 10 cents, went to sleep and woke up the next day. Not any richer, but ALIVE. And in the end, that's really all that matters. Money will come and money will go, but LIFE can not be replaced.
Yes, my apartment is small and although most of my friends live in homes far bigger and much prettier than mine, I am thankful each and every time I step foot in MY home. Many would love to have this tiny place to call theirs. I, am blessed to be able to do so.
Yes , my car is the cheapest one on the market. Not European made. Not Japanese. Not American. It's just a car. But it gets me where I need to go each day, and for me...that's really all that I need it to do. Yes, a nicer car would be nice, but I'm not trippin' over the fact that I don't have one.
Yes, I'm fat. And I seem to be getting bigger by the day (stress and lack of time for fitness). This alone would cause some to want to "check out", because FAT (according to society's standard) is the worst thing a person could be. A person could be a liar, a cheater, a thief...and people would overlook those characteristics. But to be FAT...WHOA!!!
Yes, I'm Black. And you know what...I can't change that. You wanna know somethin' else...I wouldn't change it even if I could.
Yes, I am journeying through this life alone and would love to be loved, yet love doesn't seem to be heading in my direction. Oh well.
So as you can see, it appears as though the cards are stacked against me. Yet even with those cards, I still find reason to wake up every morning. And I thank God for each and every day that He gives me. With each new day I have new hope. You see, I...am hopeFULL, not hopeLESS.
Regardless of what life throws at you, and life will throw plenty at you...you MUST know that there is ALWAYS hope. ALWAYS. In Christ Jesus, there is ALWAYS hope.
So for anyone who's feeling down and out, feeling like they can't go on...to you my friend, I say this...give tomorrow a chance. Please. Be hopeFULL, not hopeLESS.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! What (or Who) gives you hope?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
***
On Monday, one of my coworkers told me that her son's former Spanish teacher died. It was very sudden and no one knew yet what had happened.
Later that afternoon it was confirmed that she had committed suicide.
We all just shook our heads. Regardless of whether we knew her or not, it's just so sad when someone is in such despair that the only way out (at least in their mind) is to end it all.
Many would look at my life and possibly decide that it is a life not worth living. At the very least, no one's lining up to trade their lives for mine. I'm single, raising 3 kids on very little money, living in an apartment that is far too small, driving the cheapest car on the market. I'm fat. I'm Black. And the possibility of anyone loving me is slim to none. No my friends, not many people would trade their lives for mine.
Yet I wouldn't trade my life for anyone else's, and I surely wouldn't end it.
Yes, I'm single and although my choice would be to journey through this life with that special man, I'm well aware of the fact that I entered this life alone, and I'll exit alone. So in the meantime, I'm going to do all that I can to make this a life worth living.
Yes, I have very little money. But I know what it's like to have even less. I truly know what it means to have 10 cents to my name, because I've had days where all I had (in the bank and in my pocket) was only 10 cents. But I lived that day with 10 cents, went to sleep and woke up the next day. Not any richer, but ALIVE. And in the end, that's really all that matters. Money will come and money will go, but LIFE can not be replaced.
Yes, my apartment is small and although most of my friends live in homes far bigger and much prettier than mine, I am thankful each and every time I step foot in MY home. Many would love to have this tiny place to call theirs. I, am blessed to be able to do so.
Yes , my car is the cheapest one on the market. Not European made. Not Japanese. Not American. It's just a car. But it gets me where I need to go each day, and for me...that's really all that I need it to do. Yes, a nicer car would be nice, but I'm not trippin' over the fact that I don't have one.
Yes, I'm fat. And I seem to be getting bigger by the day (stress and lack of time for fitness). This alone would cause some to want to "check out", because FAT (according to society's standard) is the worst thing a person could be. A person could be a liar, a cheater, a thief...and people would overlook those characteristics. But to be FAT...WHOA!!!
Yes, I'm Black. And you know what...I can't change that. You wanna know somethin' else...I wouldn't change it even if I could.
Yes, I am journeying through this life alone and would love to be loved, yet love doesn't seem to be heading in my direction. Oh well.
So as you can see, it appears as though the cards are stacked against me. Yet even with those cards, I still find reason to wake up every morning. And I thank God for each and every day that He gives me. With each new day I have new hope. You see, I...am hopeFULL, not hopeLESS.
Regardless of what life throws at you, and life will throw plenty at you...you MUST know that there is ALWAYS hope. ALWAYS. In Christ Jesus, there is ALWAYS hope.
So for anyone who's feeling down and out, feeling like they can't go on...to you my friend, I say this...give tomorrow a chance. Please. Be hopeFULL, not hopeLESS.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! What (or Who) gives you hope?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Pretty Pretty Prom Princess
Yesterday was Jordan's prom. She was gorgeous!
In 2008, Lauren went to the prom. She, was also gorgeous!
Every time they get all "doodied up" it makes me wonder what I would look like if I were ever "doodied".
What's it like to be the "belle of the ball" and have all eyes on me?
I didn't go to my prom, so I don't know what that's like. And I've never been married, so don't know what that "special day" is like either.
I realize the my prom dream has long since past, but maybe...just maybe...there's hope for me in a wedding dress...maybe.
Then I'll be able to say that I know what it feels like to be the "Pretty Pretty Princess".
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Have YOU ever been the Pretty Pretty Princess? Either at the prom, a Quinceañera, wedding, or other special event? What was it like?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
In 2008, Lauren went to the prom. She, was also gorgeous!
Every time they get all "doodied up" it makes me wonder what I would look like if I were ever "doodied".
What's it like to be the "belle of the ball" and have all eyes on me?
I didn't go to my prom, so I don't know what that's like. And I've never been married, so don't know what that "special day" is like either.
I realize the my prom dream has long since past, but maybe...just maybe...there's hope for me in a wedding dress...maybe.
Then I'll be able to say that I know what it feels like to be the "Pretty Pretty Princess".
Let the DIALOGUE begin! Have YOU ever been the Pretty Pretty Princess? Either at the prom, a Quinceañera, wedding, or other special event? What was it like?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Where's my Lid?
This is me, the pot:
Fun to be with
Intelligent
Compassionate
A great mom
A hard worker
Easy to get along with
Follower of Christ
A servant with a desire for service (ministry)
A decent singer
An aspiring writer
Pretty on the outside
A great conversationalist
Beautiful on the inside
Lover of God's Word
A great friend
Loyal
Fat
Optimistic
A teacher (at heart)
Entertaining
Supportive
Loving
Ambitious
Healthy
Easy Going
Articulate
Spontaneous
A good sister
Educated
A good daughter
Creative
Frugal
Hopeful
I've heard it said that "there's a lid for every pot." So the question here...where is my lid?
Even with all of the qualities that I've listed, something crucial must be missing because I am still a "lidless pot".
I've noticed many women who have traits that are far less appealing with nasty attitudes, vulgar language, lazy, mean, etc...yet they have "lids". What gives?
No, this isn't a "pity party", it's merely an observation. Just trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together so that I can see the whole picture.
So our TOPIC OF THE DAY is this: Do YOU believe that there is a lid for every pot, or is it just a hopeless fairy tale?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Fun to be with
Intelligent
Compassionate
A great mom
A hard worker
Easy to get along with
Follower of Christ
A servant with a desire for service (ministry)
A decent singer
An aspiring writer
Pretty on the outside
A great conversationalist
Beautiful on the inside
Lover of God's Word
A great friend
Loyal
Fat
Optimistic
A teacher (at heart)
Entertaining
Supportive
Loving
Ambitious
Healthy
Easy Going
Articulate
Spontaneous
A good sister
Educated
A good daughter
Creative
Frugal
Hopeful
I've heard it said that "there's a lid for every pot." So the question here...where is my lid?
Even with all of the qualities that I've listed, something crucial must be missing because I am still a "lidless pot".
I've noticed many women who have traits that are far less appealing with nasty attitudes, vulgar language, lazy, mean, etc...yet they have "lids". What gives?
No, this isn't a "pity party", it's merely an observation. Just trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together so that I can see the whole picture.
So our TOPIC OF THE DAY is this: Do YOU believe that there is a lid for every pot, or is it just a hopeless fairy tale?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Sunday, May 8, 2011
To Care or Not To Care
Today is Mother's Day. All in all, I'd have to say that it's been lovely. My kids gave me wonderful gifts. Terence drew a picture of me in an outfit of my favorite colors, blue and brown. Alongside the picture he wrote me a wonderful message, that really did make me cry.
Jordan decorated a picture frame and wrote a poem to go inside the frame. More tears.
Lauren bought me a candle. Different from the candles that I usually buy...took me a minute to find a scent that I liked but low and behold, I found one. She hung her head down and said she knows she's not as creative as T & J. I don't care. It truly is the thought that counts, and to show her that I love my candle, it's burning at this very moment.
Bottom line, the 3 people to whom I mean the most showed me their love on this day.
And at 1:41 p.m. there it was...the text...the ever so meaningful TEXT!
I wasn't sure if this was better or worse than the 7 second phone call that I received last year on this special day.
I'm no "Mother of the Year", but I do try. My kids know where I am, they are fed, housed, clothed, and LOVED. I don't have men traipsing through our home. I don't drink. I don't smoke. What do I do? I work. I go to church. I've raised them in church. I make sure that they are at school every day. I help them with homework. I lend an ear when they need to talk. All the things that a Mother does.
Now I could understand getting a TEXT if I was a no-good trifling mother. Smoking, drinking, clubbing, "ho-ing", drugging, letting them run the streets, calling them no-good, and simply not caring. Sadly, I've seen mothers who fit this description, but I thank God that those descriptions don't fit me.
From what I understand, it is the thought that counts, but my heart was really hoping for something just a bit more personal and meaningful than a text.
Maybe it's because men think differently than women when it comes to being sentimental, so perhaps the well meant intention was there, but the delivery was poor.
There's a card company that suggests sending one of their cards "when you care enough to send the very best"...
I've come up with my own slogan:
"When you just don't care...send a text".
Technology has it's benefits, but when it comes to telling people how you feel about them, PLEASE pick up the phone and CALL. Texting is so impersonal.
It takes me back to what a co-worker of mine used to say, "Expect nothing and you won't be disappointed".
I wasn't expecting anything, receiving the text just made it worse. Nothing tells a person how inconsequential they are like a text on Mother's Day (and/or birthday).
Will I get over it? Of course I will. I already have. I'm just doing my part to let the world know that sometimes...every now & then...people need to HEAR your voice...not READ your texts.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! If you live away from your mother, did you CALL her today? If you live away from the mother of your children, did you CALL her today? Or did you send a text?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
Jordan decorated a picture frame and wrote a poem to go inside the frame. More tears.
Lauren bought me a candle. Different from the candles that I usually buy...took me a minute to find a scent that I liked but low and behold, I found one. She hung her head down and said she knows she's not as creative as T & J. I don't care. It truly is the thought that counts, and to show her that I love my candle, it's burning at this very moment.
Bottom line, the 3 people to whom I mean the most showed me their love on this day.
And at 1:41 p.m. there it was...the text...the ever so meaningful TEXT!
I wasn't sure if this was better or worse than the 7 second phone call that I received last year on this special day.
I'm no "Mother of the Year", but I do try. My kids know where I am, they are fed, housed, clothed, and LOVED. I don't have men traipsing through our home. I don't drink. I don't smoke. What do I do? I work. I go to church. I've raised them in church. I make sure that they are at school every day. I help them with homework. I lend an ear when they need to talk. All the things that a Mother does.
Now I could understand getting a TEXT if I was a no-good trifling mother. Smoking, drinking, clubbing, "ho-ing", drugging, letting them run the streets, calling them no-good, and simply not caring. Sadly, I've seen mothers who fit this description, but I thank God that those descriptions don't fit me.
From what I understand, it is the thought that counts, but my heart was really hoping for something just a bit more personal and meaningful than a text.
Maybe it's because men think differently than women when it comes to being sentimental, so perhaps the well meant intention was there, but the delivery was poor.
There's a card company that suggests sending one of their cards "when you care enough to send the very best"...
I've come up with my own slogan:
"When you just don't care...send a text".
Technology has it's benefits, but when it comes to telling people how you feel about them, PLEASE pick up the phone and CALL. Texting is so impersonal.
It takes me back to what a co-worker of mine used to say, "Expect nothing and you won't be disappointed".
I wasn't expecting anything, receiving the text just made it worse. Nothing tells a person how inconsequential they are like a text on Mother's Day (and/or birthday).
Will I get over it? Of course I will. I already have. I'm just doing my part to let the world know that sometimes...every now & then...people need to HEAR your voice...not READ your texts.
Let the DIALOGUE begin! If you live away from your mother, did you CALL her today? If you live away from the mother of your children, did you CALL her today? Or did you send a text?
Talk to me!
Til next time...
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