Bold and Encouraging

Out of all the various social media platforms, Facebook is my favorite and the one that I am on DAILY.

I've often heard folks say that Facebook is filled with a lot of garbage and negativity which has driven them away. I've always said that Facebook is as good as the people in your news feed...also known as your FRIENDS.

If your news feed is filled with garbage and negativity, it may be time to delete some friends. I'm jus' sayin'.

Thankfully, MY news feed is often filled with humor, encouragement, and positivity.

One thing that I particularly enjoy are the strong Men of Faith who I have as friends. There aren't many, but for the few that there are, I am thankful.

These men, who I have named the "Magnificent Seven" (y'all know how I am about sevens), boldly proclaim their faith in Christ and strive to encourage others. Although I would LOVE to mention them by name, I'm not sure how they'd feel about that, so I will simply list them by initials. Hopefully, if they EVER read my blog, they will recognize themselves in this post.

Anywhoo...here they are:

JS
EB
KH
TD
MP
EB
VC

Yes, two of them have the same initials, so no...that wasn't a mistake.

As thankful as I am to have to receive encouragement from my sisters in Christ, it's an extra blessing to know that I have these strong men as well who I can look to for spiritual encouragement. I wish I could link them all together because they would be one POWERFUL force if they all knew each other.

JS knows TD, VC and KH.

TD knows JS and VC, however KH does not know TD nor VC.

The two EBs know each other. And MP doesn't know any of the others.

Sounds like a math word problem, doesn't it?

Like I said, in my perfect world they'd ALL know each other because "iron sharpens iron."

That's it for now.

Let the DIALOGUE begin: For the Christian women who are reading this -- how important is it for YOU to have strong men of faith as part of your spiritual circles. Do you need them at all, or are your sisters in Christ enough?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Mystery Soaper

Every now and then I do something that makes me shake my head.

I did such a thing about six weeks ago.

As I've mentioned in earlier posts, I have worked at my present job for ten months now.

I'm a "brown bagger," so everyday at lunchtime I go into the kitchen with a book and make the most of my 45 minutes.

For the longest time, I'd go into the kitchen and have to wash my hands with dish soap...DISH SOAP. This made NO sense to me that the kitchen would not have HAND soap, but hey...I must wash my hands before I eat, so I made-do with the DISH soap.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I went to the 99 cent store and purchased HAND soap for the kitchen.

For the first couple of days it seemed that I was the only one using it. The level didn't go down much at all.

A few more days passed and I could finally tell that it was being used. YES!!! Clearly, my fellow officmates had been longing for HAND soap as much as I.

One bottle got used up and I replaced it with a new one.

I really felt good about my "good deed" and that others were benefiting from it. I never told anyone that I was the one bringing the soap, and it wasn't necessary for anyone to know.

Some time passed and I could see that the second bottle would soon be empty. I made a mental note to bring more.

As I stood at the sink and washed my hands, I saw this skinny little nozzle thingy attached to the sink. Hmmm. I'd never seen that before. I pressed it in an attempt to see what it was, and...YOU GUESSED IT...it was a SOAP DISPENSER! WHAT?!?

I stood there for a minute. You mean to tell me that this soap dispenser has been here ALL ALONG???

Clearly, it HAD been. I just didn't recognize what it was because MY home doesn't have one so it never registered in my mind to even look to see if the office kitchen sink had one.

Well...this left me to wonder if perhaps I'd CREATED a problem versus SOLVING one?

What if folks had gotten USED TO the soap I'd been bringing? What if OTHERS (like me) haven't yet realized that there's a soap dispenser connected to the sink. What if NOW, folks ARE using DISH SOAP to wash their hands because the HAND SOAP is gone? *sigh*

Now every time I go in the kitchen I utter a small giggle. Can't believe how I missed that, but...I did. Maybe I should make a sign pointing to the dispenser. Nah...maybe not.

How 'bout you...Let the DIALOGUE begin: Have you ever done something that you thought was SOLVING a problem, only to find that it actually CREATED one?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

You ARE the Father!

A couple nights ago I dreamt about "Joe."

Since that whole November 5th debacle, I've actually seen him more lately. Not nearly as much as I used to before November 5th, but more than I did in the one or two months after.

Things are not 100% what they were back then, but they are better than I thought they'd be -- at least up until last night when I did something that probably has him upset with me now. But if history is any indicator, he'll be upset, and then eventually, he'll cool off.

So anyway...back to the dream.

I dreamt that he had a brand new car. It was actually the same model as his current car, but it was brand new shiny.

I hopped in and we drove around for a bit.

Next thing I knew, we were at a house somewhere. It may have been OUR house. Like in the dream we were either married or living together.

So we're at the house, talking in one of the rooms. I leave that room and go into another where I pick up our two day old son who's swaddled on a beautiful turquoise blanket. His eyes were closed and he had a head full of hair.

I picked up the baby -- which had been the very first time since the baby was born, and I took him to Joe.

I don't even think Joe looked at the baby. He just said, "I don't want it."

I said, "What do you mean, you don't want it? This is the baby we've both been wanting."

Again, Joe said, "I don't want it."

I asked, "Well what are we supposed to do with him?"

Joe told me to get in the car. So I did.

He then proceeded to drive until we found an adoption agency to take the baby to. I couldn't believe this was happening. And I couldn't believe how easily I went along with what he wanted. I mean, this was MY baby too. I didn't want to give him up, but I also didn't want to raise Joe's son without Joe.

I'm not sure exactly how things turned out because I woke up.

I saw Joe this morning and meant to tell him about the dream. Didn't get a chance. But I will. I'm curious to hear what he'll think about it.

Now Let the DIALOGUE begin: What's the oddest dream that you've had recently?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Big Bad Bonus Bonanza!!!

Eleven months ago I interviewed for the position that I now currently hold with my employer.

In the interview I was informed about the "Profit Sharing Bonus" that employees are eligible for after two years of employment. That was exciting to hear!

I began my employment in May. Soon thereafter we entered our "busy season" which was INSANELY BUSY! As a result we started a record breaking streak, and at the end of the streak, we ended up with a HISTORY MAKING YEAR!

You know what that means...MO' MONEY, MO' MONEY, MO' MONEY!

Now I realize that I was being EXTREMELY optimistic, however...I felt that with such a HISTORY MAKING year, the two year employment requirement would be lifted, and we would ALL get to share in the profits. My take was this...If you were here to help make it happen, then YOU TOO should be rewarded. Even if the bonus for the newer employees had to be prorated to the amount of time that they'd been employed...at least they would get SOMETHING.

We even had a Q&A session with the owner of our company a few months back, and I threw my suggestion into the hat. Not surprisingly, he never read my question...at least not during the session.

When the session was over, he mentioned that he would be answering ALL of the questions that he wasn't able to get to during the allotted time and that the answer would go out in a company email.

Well...you can probably guess what happened next.

The email came out, and AGAIN...MY question was not answered.

Ok. I get it. My "Utopian" suggestion wasn't gonna happen. No biggie. I saw how it was. Didn't like it, but hey...it is what it is, right?

So a few weeks ago, I noticed a sign in the lunchroom announcing that "Bonus Day" is coming. What??? Bonus Day? Oh Dear!

A couple weeks ago our Supervisor went from person to person asking if they were "eligible for the bonus."

Now, was that REALLY necessary???

Surely, HR could have told him who was eligible and who wasn't. It's based on your hire date. EASY. There was absolutely NO NEED to go around the entire office asking that question. No need AT ALL.

Now here I'd been thinking that the eligible folks were gonna discreetly get their bonuses in their checks.

Nope!

Turns out that "Bonus Day" is a big PRODUCTION. There's a theme, and folks are encouraged to come dress in costume. At this news, I've gotta admit, I became a bit "salty."

You mean to tell me that folks are gonna get to parade around that day...amidst all of the folks who were NOT eligible for the bonus? Oh no! That ain't right!! To me, that's equivalent to being invited to a birthday party, taking a gift, and then being told that you will not be able to have any cake. You can sing "Happy Birthday" if you want...actually, you are ENCOURAGED to sing...BUT...do NOT expect to have a piece of cake, because at THIS party...there's NO CAKE FOR YOU!

Yeah, I realize that I'm thinking with my "inner 5 year old" brain, but REALLY...that's what this is.

Again though...to all of this I said, "No biggie."

Although I am happy for my co-workers who are eligible and will be partaking in the festivities, I am simply not mature enough to be there when it's all going down. So...I've requested the day off.

Problem solved...right?

WRONG!!!

Today at work, all of the eligible folks got badges that they are to wear ALL WEEK long that shows how many years they've received the bonus. Yep...Instead of this being a one-day event, it's actually a WEEK LONG AFFAIR. As you can imagine...it's gonna be a LOONNNGGGG week.

Anywhoo...perhaps when next year's "Bonus Day" rolls around, I will have the maturity level of at least a teenager with regard to this matter. It'll still seem wrong, but at least I'll deal with it better, and perhaps I'll actually come to work that day. As for this year...I'm just not there.

And for everyone out there saying, "You should be THANKFUL that you even HAVE a job...bonus or not." Yes, I get it, and I am. This is not that. This (at least for me) is a totally separate issue. I am quite thankful for my employment and don't take it for granted. There's just somethin' about the way that this whole bonus thing goes down that just doesn't sit well with me. That's all.

Now...Let the DIALOGUE begin: Does YOUR company give bonuses? If so, do you have to wait a certain amount of time before you are eligible to receive it?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

SINGin' and SIGNin'!

Today I had the wonderful opportunity to visit another church (pulled from my bowl).

This was the 2nd that I've visited this year during my "Season of Visitation."

Pretty much ALL of the churches that I will be visiting are churches that my Christian friends attend. As I scroll through my Facebook feed on Sunday mornings, I make note of who's checked in where, and in the bowl it goes. I make it a point to not tell anyone that I'm visiting their church. That may sound odd, but I just want my experience to be as organic as possible...so if they happen to be there when I visit...great. And if not...that's okay too.

The church I visited this morning begins worship service at 9:00. A little early for my taste, but before my church had our own church home, we held service at our "sister church" and began at 8:30. So 9:00 isn't that much of a stretch.

I arrived, walked in and was immediately and warmly greeted by a woman whose name I now know is Doris.

She asked if I was a visitor or a guest. I said visitor.

She asked how I'd heard about the church and I told her that I have a friend who attends with his family.

She told me that she hadn't seen them yet, but encouraged me to go on in, have a seat, and join in as they worshiped the Lord.

I did just that.

Found a place to set my things and joined right in with Praise and Worship. I immediately sensed the presence of the Lord in that house and my spirit knew that this would be a great experience.

One thing that particularly moved me was the sign language interpreter. She signed those songs TO THE GLORY OF GOD! It was BEAUTIFUL!!!

At one point, we sang a song that had alto, tenor and soprano parts to it. To my wonderful surprise, there was not just ONE sign language interpreter, but THREE...each singing and signing their own part. Can you say POWERFUL! That's exactly what it was...POWERFUL!!!

I kept watching trying to catch words here and there. I learned "forever" and "Jesus (which is pictured here)." Just watching them made me want to learn. They did so much more than just stand there and move their hands. Their facial expressions showed their awe for God. The way they moved their bodies to emphasize certain words showed their awe for God. They were simply AMAZING.

After Praise and Worship was over, the Pastor took to the pulpit, greeted the congregation, covered some things pertaining to various ministries in the church and ultimately got into the message. One thing I noticed while listening to him discuss the ministries within their church was that they are a Bible-believing, Bible-led church. And if anyone is in a ministry leadership capacity there, they MUST devote time to studying God's Word. In hearing that, once again, I knew I was in the right place. This Pastor's stance on ministry leadership matches that of my own Pastor. How can one lead spiritually, if they don't have God's Word in them? The short answer is...they can't.

The message came from Matthew 6:31-33, and the title was "Seek first the kingdom."

In a nutshell, there are so many things that we desire, and none of them are a surprise to God. But if we seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, then those things we desire will be added unto us, as long as they are according to His will.

So that was my visitation experience this morning to Victory Institutional Baptist Church. I am happy to say that God was truly glorified.

Let the DIALOGUE begin: Do you know how to speak American Sign Language?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Full Speed Ahead!

This post should have been written YESTERDAY, but I got home so late that I wrote and posted before I realized what happened.

You see...YESTERDAY'S post was the 555TH post here at The Dialogue Den. That's a fairly major accomplishment, and I'm gonna take this moment to pat myself on the back.

I started posting back in 2010 and I've gotta be honest...there have been MANY discouraging moments.

Wondering WHEN my sweet little blog will develop a LARGE following...
Wondering WHEN folks will DIALOGUE with me on EVERY post...
Wondering if my writing is in vain.

Nevertheless, even with all of the unknowns, I have continued to write, because it's what I have to do FOR ME.

WRITING IS WHAT I DO.
WRITING IS WHAT I WILL DO.

I'm not a political blogger.
I'm not a food blogger.
I'm not a faith blogger.
I'm not a love and relationship blogger.
I'm not a women's issues blogger.
I'm not a parenting expert blogger.
I'm not a career blogger.

Yet on any given day, I can be ANY and ALL of those. It just depends on what's swirling around in my head at the time.

What I have recently discovered is that The Dialogue Den is not a "field of dreams" where...once it's built, followers will come. No...I've got some work to do...a LOT of work toward developing a consistent following. Where I'll find the time for that...I have NO IDEA. But I've gotta find it if I want The Dialogue Den to become what I had envisioned when I wrote the very first post on June 10, 2010.

Some may be wondering why I chose to celebrate the 555TH post. I dunno. I just felt that it needed to be celebrated.

At this moment I would like to acknowledge THREE of my very faithful readers. Their support means the world to me and I just want them to know how much I appreciate them. I won't list them by name, but I will list their initials. They'll know who they are. *smile*

So to KC, TH, and WN...I want you three to know that I TRULY appreciate your support and encouragement toward my writing efforts.

And to my recent commenter, Rebecca...all the way from Mississauga, ON, Canada...I would also like to say THANK YOU. Your comment made me aware of the fact that The Dialogue Den is reaching places that I was unaware. I'm not sure if you found the blog online or on its Facebook page. However you found it, please know that you've put a grand smile on this blogger's face.

Now...Let the DIALOGUE begin: What are some of your favorite blogs, and what do you like most about them?

Talk to me!

Til next time...

Big Chop-aversary!

Three years ago today, I walked into a barber shop, hopped in the chair, showed the barber a picture of Solange Knowles with a VERY short hair cut, and said, "That's what I want."

The barber looked at the picture, then at me...with hair past my shoulders, and said, "Are you sure?"

I said, "Yep."

"Alright then. Let's do this."

I still remember the faces of the other men in the shop. They sat in wonderment waiting to see what was about to happen to my flowing head of hair. After the first buzz...they knew EXACTLY what was about to go down.

If there had been any second thoughts, they all went out the window after that first buzz. There was NO turning back. I wasn't sure what to make of the barber's excitement. It almost felt a bit uncomfortable...kinda awkward.

Once he was finished he handed me the mirror and I sat in awe at the fact that my hair was now about a quarter of an inch long...if even that. I LOVED IT!

It was as though I were starting all over again.

I had to learn how to care for my new short cut. As time progressed, I had to learn how to care for it during the "transitional" phases. And ohhh...there were MANY transitional phases.

By the time March 1, 2014 rolled around, I was HATING my hair. It was four different textures, and the patch in the middle of my head was noticeably shorter than the rest of my hair. I couldn't understand what was happening.

My hair was pretty decent BEFORE I'd cut it all off. But the way it grew back was TERRIBLE. My fellow "naturalistas" suggested product after product to try. NOTHING WORKED.

Finally, July 1st rolled around and I couldn't take it anymore. I went to a local salon and asked the stylist to cut my hair down to its healthiest length. She did, and I walked out with my hair about an inch long.

After that I continued to try various hair products in the search for what would work with MY hair.

A couple years later, I have now discovered that my hair LOVES the Cantu line of products, and just this morning (Yes, I'm still trying stuff out), I learned that my hair also loves COCONUT OIL. Who knew?!?

After months of hating my hair, I am now at a point where I absolutely LOVE it. I love the versatility most of all. I can "wash and go" and love it, or get it pressed at the salon, and love it. Either way I wear it works for me.

So for all the women out there who are considering the "big chop," I would say, "DO IT!" Just know that there will be many phases and transitions during the "growing back" process...some you'll love, and others...not so much.

In case you were wondering...that's the back of my head in the pic, taken on 3/1/13.

Now, let the DIALOGUE begin: What is YOUR favorite hair care product?

Talk to me!

Til next time...